Tears of an Angel
by Cassy27
Summary: Arthur loses Merlin during a battle and he feels lost, guilty. As everyone is trying to understand that Merlin will not come back,they are stunned to find he has come back. Merlin has changed,however,and his friends try to help him. Will Merlin be okay?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any of the Merlin characters.

**Summary**: When Arthur loses Merlin during a battle, he feels lost and guilty. As everyone is trying to understand that Merlin will not come back, they are stunned to find he has come back. Merlin has changed, however, and his friends try to help him. Will everything be alright?

**Set during season 2**: I really don't want Morgana to be evil. She always used to be such a close friend to Gwen and she was there for Merlin and Arthur should they need her. I really miss that so now I can have that back.

**AN**: Any and all mistakes are completely my own. I named this story after a song that I kept listening to while writing this chapter. Tears of an Angel by RyanDan is simply beautiful and has in fact inspired me.

**- Tears of an Angel -**

**Chapter 1**

The attack was brute and abrupt. Not a knight had expected it, but as always, they fought well and with all their heart. After all, they had much to defend. The rebels had appeared out of nowhere, their swords heavy in their hands and their eyes filled with rage and determination. It was clear they were not going to give up until the last man of Camelot's army was dead.

Arthur had simply not seen it coming. He had been riding with his men through the forest, having thought they were on a routine reconnaissance mission. Many inhabitants of a small village near the border of Camelot had complained about missing food and animals and Arthur had been ordered by his father to take some men to see what it was all about. Having arrived in the village, Arthur had found nothing suspicious. The villagers had told him the rebels must have moved on since nothing was stolen anymore.

Arthur had taken his men and left only to have walked into a trap. There were at least two dozen men fighting them and only ten knights were present. And of course Merlin. Arthur had no time to worry about his servant, however, considering he was fighting five rebels at the same time. A deep cut already ran all the way up his arm. The soft fabric of his tunic was soaked with blood, but Arthur knew it was not all his.

"Arthur!" It was Leon who called, warning the Prince about a cowardly attack from behind. Arthur spun around just in time to see the sharp edge of a sword swing at his throat. Arthur jumped back, his own sword shifting in his hand and lashing forward. He hit the rebel in his chest and he instantly fell down, his hands cradling the wounded flesh. Only now did Arthur see how young the rebel truly was, perhaps fifteen years old.

Arthur had no time to think about this. Right now it was kill or be killed. Arthur ran towards a knight who was in trouble, having deep wounds in his neck and back. Arthur struck the two attacking rebels hard and swiftly.

"We can not win this battle," the knight Bedivere said, "we must retreat."

Arthur let his gaze slide around. Bedivere was right. There were simply too much rebels and already three knights had fallen. Arthur wasn't even sure if they were truly dead or mortally wounded. It was then that he heard his name being called out again.

"Arthur!" Leon ran forward, but he was held back by a rebel who cut of his passage. "Arthur!" With his sword, Leon pointed to his left and Arthur rapidly shifted his gaze towards Leon was pointing to.

His breath fell flat in his chest, his heart suddenly speeding and his blood racing through his veins. He could not believe what he was seeing and all that Arthur knew, was that he needed to prevent it.

"Merlin!" Arthur turned away from Bedivere as he started to run. He jumped over the bodies of dead rebels, he even rushed past a fallen knight in his hurry to reach his servant. He knew he could never reach Merlin in time, no one could. "Merlin!" he called out again.

Merlin, only having Arthur call out his name now, turned his head in bewilderment as he couldn't understand why Arthur would sound this distressed. The young warlock carried a sword himself, probably one he had taken from a fallen rebel since he never carried any weapons. His eyes locked with those of Arthur's for one short second, but it was long enough for Merlin to understand what was happening.

Merlin twirled around, only now seeing the rebel heading for him, but he was too late. The sword of the enemy buried itself deep into his stomach, the pain searing through Merlin like a thousand hot needles penetrating him. He gasped for air, but he was unable to move and as the rebel retracted the sword from his body, Merlin could no longer hold his own weight. He fell towards the ground, his hands covering the deep bleeding wound and instantly, they turned a dark red.

Merlin knew the blood should still feel warm, but it seemed he was unable to feel anything else but the cold wind brushing him. Everything was cold.

"Merlin." Arthur was with him only a second later. One second too late. "Look at me," Arthur ordered his servant. The Prince dropped his sword next to him, using his hands as he pulled his servant closer to him, his head resting in his lap. "Merlin, look at me." Arthur turned Merlin's head, only to see how Merlin's blue eyes had become vacant. Empty.

"No," Arthur roughly shook Merlin's body, "wake up." His hands trembled as he reached for Merlin's hands. "Don't die." There came to response.

Merlin was gone.

**AN: So what did you think? Should I continue this?**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any of the Merlin characters.

**Summary**: When Arthur loses Merlin during a battle, he feels lost and guilty. As everyone is trying to understand that Merlin will not come back, they are stunned to find he has come back. Merlin has changed, however, and his friends try to help him. Will everything be alright?

**Set during early season 2**: I really don't want Morgana to be evil. She always used to be such a close friend to Gwen and she was there for Merlin and Arthur should they need her. I really miss that so now I can have that back.

**AN**: Any and all mistakes are completely my own. I updated as quickly as possible. I hope this was quick enough. I really wanted to show some reactions to Merlin's death.

Thanks to all those that left me a review! They inspired me to write this chapter so quickly. Here come chapter 2...

**- Tears of an Angel -**

**Chapter ****2**

Word of the return of the Prince had quickly spread throughout the city of Camelot. Arthur and his men had returned, but not all of them had made it back. Gwen's heart had felt heavy in her chest when hearing the news, but she had been assured that Arthur himself was alright.

Now she found herself hurrying through the halls of the castle. When reaching the main square, she felt the warmth of the sun playing on her skin, but she didn't even pay any attention to it. Her gaze only sought Arthur and when she found him as he slowly descended his horse, she smiled. It felt as if a weight had been released from around her chest and she could now breathe freely again.

Behind her, Morgana arrived as she must have heard the news as well. While Gwen wore her usual working-dress, Morgana was elegant with her hair braided and a long velvet blue dress embracing her body. "Where is Merlin?" Morgana asked.

Morgana's question pulled Gwen back to the harsh reality. She glanced around, searching for a clumsy servant that was bound to be around Arthur. In stead, Gwen only found another servant taking care of Arthur's horse. The Prince came walking towards the two women, his steps hesitant. Gwen could not wait, however, and she ran down the stone stairs.

"Where is he?" she asked. Panic filled her voice, her legs trembling beneath her body. A thousand different scenarios came to her mind and they all had one factor in common: Merlin was _not_ dead.

"Gwen," Arthur took her small hand into his. He quickly dropped it again when noticing there was still blood on his fingers.

"Don't," Gwen's voice was harsh, almost threatening, "don't say it."

Arthur's gaze fell down as he was unable to look at the woman he secretly loved. "I'm sorry," he said, "I couldn't save him."

"He is dead?" Gwen's voice was high and filled with disbelief. She needed to hear Arthur say the actual words. She closed her eyes, preparing herself for the news she already knew, and tears escaped the corners of her eyes.

"Yes," Arthur said, his blue eyes fixed on the broken image of Gwen. His words hurt her, but there was no escaping this. "Merlin is dead."

-o-o-

Arthur held his breath. He saw the edges of his vision starting to fade and blur as he started to lose focus. Slowly, he exhaled, trying to prepare himself for the next conversation. There was no right time to enter, however, no right time to tell someone this devastating news-

He knocked swiftly and without hesitation. Standing before the closed door, thinking about how difficult the next moment would be, did Arthur no good. This way, he forced himself to not turn away a coward. Gwen had offered to tell Gaius the news, but Arthur had refused, needing to tell Gaius this himself. He needed to see the man's reaction as he needed to confront the consequences of his actions. He hadn't protected Merlin when it had mattered.

The door opened, Gaius standing before the Prince as worry instantly filled his face when seeing the exhausted Arthur. "Come in," he quickly stepped aside, "I'll take care of your wounded arm."

Arthur entered while looking at the cut that was clearly visible. He had forgotten all bout the wound as it didn't matter. It didn't even cause any pain, though Arthur couldn't be sure of that. His minds was too occupied to notice anything.

"Gaius," Arthur said, turning to look at the physician, "I'm here because of Merlin."

"He's not here," Gaius said, sounding confused.

"I know," Arthur bit down on his lower lip, tasting the salty blood, "that is why I am here. We were attacked by rebels and we were outnumbered."

Gaius listened intently, seemingly unaware of the truth that Arthur was trying to tell him.

"Merlin fought with us, but there were too many. Gaius," Arthur was starting to notice a paleness to the physician's face, "Merlin died."

A moment of silence fell.

"Could you-" Gaius' voice was fragile as if it could break any moment. He cast his gaze down down, his lips pressed together. "Please leave."

"I'm sorry," Arthur said.

"Please," Gaius repeated.

Arthur couldn't stand the pain in Gaius' voice, but he respected his wish. Slowly, he walked back to the door, only glancing back once to see Gaius sliding down on a wooden bench at the table. He wanted to say something, but nothing he said would bring any comfort.

And so Arthur left Gaius alone, understanding so well how he must feel at this very moment. After all, Arthur too had lost a dear and close friend.

**AN: Another chapter is done. I know it is rather short, but this was the perfect place to end it. I hope it was enjoyed!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any of the Merlin characters.

**Summary**: When Arthur loses Merlin during a battle, he feels lost and guilty. As everyone is trying to understand that Merlin will not come back, they are stunned to find he has come back. Merlin has changed, however, and his friends try to help him. Will everything be alright?

**Set during season 2**: I really don't want Morgana to be evil. She always used to be such a close friend to Gwen and she was there for Merlin and Arthur should they need her. I really miss that so now I can have that back.

**AN**: Any and all mistakes are completely my own. Morgana might be OOC here, but I like her the best when she is acting as a close friend to Arthur. She can be such a support, you know? I like her evil as well in season 3, but I still prefer her as a kind ward that only wants what is best for her friends...

**- Tears of an Angel -**

**Chapter ****3**

His sword was hitting the training doll hard, its edge cutting a little deeper into the bound straw as he hit it again and again. The rain was pouring down, having soaked Arthur completely. He didn't care. The guilt which he felt for Merlin's death had not disappeared, but he felt it less as anger was starting to gain more control.

He was angry at the rebel who killed Merlin. He was angry at himself for not having saved him and he was angry at Merlin for having died. Not many emotions that Arthur was experiencing made much sense at the moment. Anger. Guilt. Hurt.

And so Arthur kept hitting the doll, his arms growing tired due to the force he was demanding of them. "Stupid," he yelled and as his lips parted, he tasted the sweet rain on his tongue, "stupid. Stupid! STUPID!"

"Arthur?"

Arthur instantly let his sword drop back to his side. The last thing he wanted was to hurt Morgana. He had caused enough pain already. "Go inside," he ordered. He didn't turn around to look at her.

"Only if you come with me," Morgana said.

Arthur slowly exhaled as he turned to look at her. Her green eyes seemed bright against the dark background. Her red dress had turned almost black because of the rain and her once shiny curls lay flat against her cheeks as they were completely wet. Her arms cradled her chest as she tried to warm herself.

The sky above them grew even darker until it appeared almost black. It seemed like it was the middle of the night even though it was still early in the afternoon.

"I'm training," Arthur said. He looked at Morgana, only now realizing ho small she appeared as she stood before him.

"You're torturing yourself," she said in a quiet voice, "there is a difference."

Slowly, Arthur shook his head. "Let me be," he was on the verge of tears, but he refused to let them run freely down his face. Not that Morgana would be able to notice; it was raining too hard for that.

"Merlin was your friend," Morgana said, "you are allowed to mourn him, you know, show that you actually care."

Arthur turned his face away. "I should have helped him," he said, "he never was good at fighting with a sword."

Morgana nodded, a faint smile covering the edge's of her lips. "That's true," she said. Her smile disappeared again. "You couldn't have saved him. Leon told us everything. You could have never reached him in time, no one could. This is not your fault."

Arthur threw down his sword. It made a sharp noise as it hit the stone ground, but the unpleasant sound was quickly overwhelmed by the falling rain that seemed to dull everything around them.

"I've let him down," Arthur said carefully. He wasn't used to confiding in someone, certainly not about something so personal and certainly not in Morgana. "He was my servant, my friend and I should have been there to protect him."

"No one blames you, Arthur," Morgana said.

"_Everyone_ blames me," Arthur closed his eyes for a short second. When he opened them again, he could feel Morgana's gaze penetrating his and it felt oddly uncomfortable. He shouldn't even be talking about this. "Gaius barely looks at me anymore. Merlin was the son he never had and he lost him because of me."

"We're all dealing with this in our own way," Morgana sounded regretful that she couldn't tell Arthur that he was wrong, "we all have to accept that Merlin is gone." She took a step closer to the Prince. "No matter how many times we tell you that this isn't your fault, you won't ever accept it unless you believe it yourself."

Arthur found himself filled with resentment. Not only was everyone around him mourning and in pain, he was actually causing them more worries. The last thing he wanted, was to be an burden to his friends and family.

"Come inside," Morgana said. She stretched out her hand for Arthur to take it. A flash of lightning shot across the sky, illuminating everything for a brief moment. Arthur took Morgana's soft hand into his, allowing her to guide him away from this place. Suddenly, another flash of lightning struck and this time, it made contact with the stones beneath them.

Smoke twirled upwards, rain flooding the square and washing away all that lay loose. Morgana shrieked as she nearly fell back, but Arthur caught her, pulling her closer to him in order to keep her safe. This was a thunderstorm unlike he had ever seen in his life.

"Arthur," Morgana pointed to the exact spot where the lightning had struck. Only the ground was not empty.

As the smoke started to lift, the water clearing away again, their view became clear and Arthur saw a naked body lay on the cold ground. His arms were cradling his knees that were pulled up high against his stomach. Shivers ran down his back as rain poured down on him. His eyes were squeezed shut as if everything he experienced was painful.

"My God," Morgana gasped, "it's Merlin."

**AN: Cliffhanger! Is that evil of me? I guess it is, but I found this the perfect ending for the chapter. Perhaps it is a comfort that I will be updating soon?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any of the Merlin characters.

**Summary**: When Arthur loses Merlin during a battle, he feels lost and guilty. As everyone is trying to understand that Merlin will not come back, they are stunned to find he has come back. Merlin has changed, however, and his friends try to help him. Will everything be alright?

**Set during season 2**: I really don't want Morgana to be evil. She always used to be such a close friend to Gwen and she was there for Merlin and Arthur should they need her. I really miss that so now I can have that back.

**AN**: Any and all mistakes are completely my own. Thank you so much for all the nice reviews!

**- Tears of an Angel -**

**Chapter 4**

Arthur ran forward, his legs barely able to sustain the weight of his own body. It felt as if the earth itself had disappeared from underneath his legs. Nothing around him seemed to make sense. Not the heavy rain or the fleeting lightning and certainly not the part where Merlin had appeared out of nowhere. When having reached Merlin, Arthur shrugged of his own long, red coat. He placed it carefully on Merlin's shivering body.

It was only no that Arthur could see the details of Merlin's features. His gray-like skin, his eyelids that appeared to be almost translucent and the little drops of blood rolling over his white lips. Even worse was to see that the skin around his stomach was torn and bleeding. Normally the wound was supposed to be larger. After all, Merlin had been stabbed with a sword.

"Arthur," Morgana breathed, "he looks awful."

"Search for Gaius," Arthur said, his gaze never leaving Merlin's face, "I will get Merlin inside."

Morgana didn't hesitate and ran across the main square, disappearing into the castle only a second later. Arthur knew what his task was, but he found it difficult to lean forward and reach out to Merlin. The young servant boy seemed in so much pain and Arthur feared that getting him inside would cause even more agony.

Arthur pulled himself together, however, knowing that the rain pouring down on Merlin couldn't do him much good either. His arms reached underneath Merlin's torso and just as he was about to lift him up from the cold and wet ground, he heard the familiar voice of Leon.

"Let me help you, Sire," Leon said who came rushing towards them, "Morgana explained to me what has happened." Leon didn't hesitate and took Merlin's legs into his arms.

Together it was easier to get Merlin inside. He might look skinny and tiny, Merlin certainly weighed enough. They quickly hurried inside where the warmth of the burning torches was more than welcoming. As other servants witnessed Arthur and Leon carrying Merlin, they quickly moved aside, their lips parted in surprise. Arthur gave it no attention. Merlin was his only thought.

They quickly reached Arthur's chambers and gently, they lay Merlin onto the soft bed. He might be out of the cold, he was still shivering and the tips of his fingers had turned into a blueish color. Arthur pulled open his closet and grabbed a blanket made out of wool. Spreading it across Merlin's body, he could see how his servant appeared to relax a little.

"Merlin?" Arthur asked carefully. He moved closer towards him, his hand gently brushing the wet hair from Merlin's eyes. "Can you hear me, Merlin?"

Merlin didn't respond. His eyes remained closed and his arms had moved so that they were cradling his chest. It was horrible for Arthur to see him like this and there was nothing he could do for him. If only he knew what had happened, how Merlin had come back. Arthur exhaled slowly, pushing back that one thought he refused to have.

_Magic._

There simply was no other explanation. How else would Merlin have gotten back from the dead because he _had_ died. Arthur had seen his empty eyes, he had searched for a pulse, but he had not found any. Merlin had been gone, yet here he lay, heavy breathing and suffering.

The door of his chambers suddenly opened, Morgana and Gaius bursting inside. Arthur could see Gaius' relief changing into horror and despair. The prince could understand how difficult this was for Gaius. Merlin was like a son to him after all.

"Help him," Arthur said when noticing that Gaius seemed hesitant to move towards Merlin, "please."

Gaius sprung into action, checking Merlin's pulse and breathing. He quickly moved to examine his stomach wound, cleaning and stitching it carefully before rubbing a thick and smelly ointment on the wound in order to prevent any infections or other diseases. All that time, Merlin didn't even more or flinch. He showed no sign at all that he was aware of his surroundings and that frightened Arthur more than anything.

-o-o-

It was completely dark outside. Arthur stood before his window, his arms crossed before his chest and his right shoulder leaning against the cold stones. When looking up, he saw no stars, not even the moon. That wasn't all that odd, but the lack of people down in the streets of Camelot was. It seemed the city was completely abandoned even though it was only nine in the evening. The storm from earlier in the afternoon had startled many, and they all stayed inside, afraid that another thunderstorm would hit.

For a short moment, Arthur closed his eyes. He could hear the relaxed snoring of Gaius who had dozed off into a shallow sleep. Merlin's breathing was steady and soft as he still lay in the royal bed. Arthur didn't mind, of course. For the first time today, everything seemed to quiet down.

Arthur didn't allow himself to fall asleep, however. Someone needed to keep an eye on Merlin and Gaius deserved some rest considering-

"It hurts!"

Merlin's cry made Arthur spun around on his heels. He hurried towards Merlin who sat upwards in his bed. His legs kicked out and his arms seemed to search for something to hold onto. Arthur went to sit on the edge of the bed, trying to take hold of Merlin's arms before he could hurt himself or worse, rip his stitches.

"Merlin," Arthur tried to sound soothing, but he realized his voice was filled with panic, "it's okay."

"It hurts!" Merlin's cheeks became wet with tears rolling down. "It never stops!" His breathing became irregular, his chest moving up and down in short, jerking movements. "It never _ends_."

Arthur, who had finally gotten hold of Merlin's arms and held them down, tried to make eye contact with his servant, but as he moved closer towards him, Merlin moved back, seemingly afraid of the prince.

"What never ends?" Arthur asked. He couldn't understand what Merlin was talking about.

Merlin pulled free his hands, his body starting to relax a little. His fingers moved to his temples where his black hair stuck to his skin because of the sweat. His gaze finally found Arthur's, but all that Arthur could see what confusion, pain and despair. "Nothing ever _stops_," Merlin breathed.

Arthur swallowed heavily. It was only now that he could truly see Merlin. His clammy skin had a ghostlike gray color. The dark blue circles only emphasized his blue eyes, but they also revealed how exhausted Merlin was.

Merlin closed his eyes, tears still running down his cheeks. It was as if something surrounded Merlin that only he could see because he suddenly started convulsing again, his legs kicking out and his arms moving wildly.

Arthur quickly tried to hold him down again as he watched Merlin fall back, his body suddenly appearing boneless. Arthur held up his servant's body only to lay it gently down into the cushions. When seeing Merlin lay before him, weak and powerless, Arthur found it difficult to move as he watched his servant drift off into a sleep, or perhaps even a nightmare.

Only then did Arthur remember that Gaius was in the room as well. The prince turned his head, only to see Gaius sit motionless in his chair. His eyes stood large, his hands trembling. Arthur wanted to tell him that everything would be alright with Merlin, but he couldn't.

Arthur didn't know the truth, he didn't even know what exactly had happened or how. He certainly didn't know what was going to happen. Arthur knew absolutely nothing and he hated it.

**AN: Another chapter has ended. So...what's up with Merlin? You'll have to keep coming back to this story to find out! Thanks for having read this chapter!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any of the Merlin characters.

**Summary**: When Arthur loses Merlin during a battle, he feels lost and guilty. As everyone is trying to understand that Merlin will not come back, they are stunned to find he has come back. Merlin has changed, however, and his friends try to help him. Will everything be alright?

**AN**: Any and all mistakes are completely my own. Thank you so much for all the nice reviews! I hope this chapter will be enjoyed!

**- Tears of an Angel -**

**Chapter 5**

Arthur sucked in a long and deep breath. His father had summoned him which could not be good. Everyone had known Merlin had died and now everyone knew he was back. Of course Uther would have questions, Arthur had anticipated as much, but the Prince still had no idea what he could tell his father. Slowly, he pushed open the doors that led him into the Council Chamber. Uther sat at the head of the long wooden table, papers and maps scattered before him.

"Arthur," the King greeted him, "finally you are here."

Arthur remained silent. There was a small part in the back of his head that wished that this conversation wouldn't be about Merlin.

"I've heard the news," Uther said, his voice cold and stern.

Arthur cringed inwards, though he made sure his father couldn't see it.

"Your servant has returned," Uther spoke, his words chosen carefully, "but you have told me he had died."

"I can't explain it," Arthur said and it was the honest truth. He looked straight into the eyes of his father, ready for whatever Uther would say next.

"I can," Uther's gaze darkened, "_magic_."

"You can't be sure," Arthur protested, "what has happened is unique and-"

"You are young," Uther interrupted his son. He rose from his seat, his gaze oddly sympathetic. "You have not seen magic like I have. It takes many forms and it searches to gain our trust, only to throw it back in our faces." Uther sighed. "Merlin has betrayed you, Arthur."

Arthur could feel anger rise in his chest. "He came back," he said, hoping he still had control over his voice. It was simply impossible to talk to his father when it concerned magic. "Merlin came back in a way we can't explain and you want to execute him?"

"Magic is evil," Uther spoke harshly, the palm of his hand slamming own on the hard wooden surface of the table before him, "I can recognize it, Arthur. I must be vigilant and protect our Kingdom and its people."

"_Merlin_ is one of our people," Arthur was shocked. He couldn't believe he was actually having this conversation. "You will not touch him," he saw shock cross Uther's face, "he is under my protection." Knowing that he was playing this dangerously, Arthur turned around and left the Council Chamber without waiting for a response of his father. He knew this matter was not over yet, but Arthur had other concerns, namely Merlin.

-o-o-

Merlin lay in his own bed, though Arthur suspected it made little difference to the young servant. Merlin hadn't even flinched when he and Leon had carried him to Gaius' chambers. It was better this way, however, as the old physician could now remain closer to Merlin during the day and the night.

It had only been a day since Merlin had come back from the dead, but Arthur wished he would just wake up already. Gaius had warned him that Merlin needed rest considering the weak state his body was in now. It might as well take another week before Merlin would wake up again. Arthur wanted answers, however, he wanted to know the truth of what had happened.

The Prince sighed heavily. There still lay difficult times ahead and he wondered if he would be able to cope with them. All this was beyond him, it was a situation he had thought he would never have to live through. This was Merlin, though, and Arthur would try his best to help him in any way possible.

The door of Merlin's bedroom slowly opened and Arthur quickly drew out his sword. The conversation with his father still lay fresh in his mind and the idea that Uther might have sent someone to kill Merlin terrified him. He was prepared for that, however, and so he silently creeped closer to the opened door, his sword firmly in his hand.

"Whoa!"

"Lancelot?" Arthur quickly stepped back, allowing Lancelot to enter the bedroom. He lowered his sword, a wave of relief washing through him. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

"I came as soon as I heard the news of Merlin's death," Lancelot explained, his gaze instantly dropping to the sleeping Merlin, "only when I came to the city, word reached me he had returned. What happened?"

Arthur turned to look at their very pale friend as well. He wished he could tell Lancelot what it all meant. "I don't know what to think of it," Arthur admitted, "but magic has to be involved, right?"

Lancelot let his gaze slide from Merlin to Arthur. There was a slight hesitation in his face that Arthur had barely recognized, but it had disappeared so quickly that the Prince doubted if he had even seen it properly.

"He came back from the dead," Lancelot said, "and I don't think that has ever happened, not that I know of, but this is Merlin and he is our friend."

Arthur nodded. "I know."

"Then what's with the sword?" Lancelot asked carefully, his hand pointing to the sharp object still resting firmly in Arthur's hand.

"Oh," Arthur quickly placed it back into his belt around his waist, "I thought my father might have sent someone. Sorry I nearly killed you."

"No problem," Lancelot smiled faintly. "So the King doesn't trust this."

"He would have him executed," Arthur explained, "but I won't let that happen."

-o-o-

Lancelot had gone to talk to Gaius who was working on a medicine that would strengthen Merlin's body. That was the theory at least. Arthur had remained alone with Merlin in the little bedroom, as for Arthur, that was the only way he could keep his injured friend safe and that was to stay close to him. The mere thought of Uther wanting to kill Merlin sent shivers down his back.

Hoping that Gaius might have found some answers in his thick and old books, Arthur turned to the door. It still stood open slightly from when Lancelot had left the room and Arthur could hear him talk to Gaius.

"He should know," Lancelot said, his voice almost a whisper. It was clear that Lancelot and Gaius didn't want Arthur to hear their conversation and Arthur certainly didn't mean to intrude. Only this was about Merlin (what else would they be talking about?) and Arthur needed to know.

"I has always been Merlin's decision," Gaius said, "it still remains that way."

"He died," there was pure astonishment in Lancelot's voice, "and he came _back_. Arthur already knows on some level. We have to trust him."

"I want to," Gaius sighed, "and Merlin has wanted to on so many occasions, but we are still in Camelot. It is too dangerous."

Arthur felt angry. He thought he was considered their friend, that he had proven himself loyal and trustworthy. Yet, they still doubted him. Arthur was about to storm out of the bedroom to demand what they were talking about when he heard a soft moan.

"Hmpf," Merlin sighed.

Arthur could see that Merlin was slowly waking up, his hands balled into fists and his eyes squeezed shut. Pain was still very much visible in his pale features, but at least he wasn't crying out in agony. Arthur pushed open the door, his anger already forgotten. Lancelot and Gaius gazed up in surprise.

"He is waking up," Arthur told them. He turned back to look at his friend, only-

Merlin was gone. The bed in which he had been laying in only a second ago, was now empty. Merlin was no longer in the room. He had simply vanished.

**AN: Thanks for having read this. I know that not much action is happening, but the focus of this story lays on emotion, namely Arthur's. Things are bound to happen, though, so stick around! :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any of the Merlin characters.

**Summary**: When Arthur loses Merlin during a battle, he feels lost and guilty. As everyone is trying to understand that Merlin will not come back, they are stunned to find he has come back. Merlin has changed, however, and his friends try to help him. Will everything be alright?

**AN**: Any and all mistakes are completely my own. I know it has been a while since the last update, but here is the next chapter! Enjoy!

**- Tears of an Angel -**

**Chapter ****6**

The sun came over the horizon, instantly casting everything into an orange glow. The streets of Camelot were still abandoned and Arthur found it odd to be walking through them. It was still early in the morning, but time was running out. Merlin still had not been found and Arthur grew afraid that they would never find him. He had come back from the dead so very suddenly, so there was a chance he could disappear again in the blink of an eye.

They had searched throughout the entire castle, but they had not found him anywhere. They had gone to Gwen's house, but she had not seen Merlin either. There were little other places they could search for him and Arthur was growing desperate. He needed to find him and fast because the last time he had seen his servant, he had still been very weak. He feared the idea of what could happen to Merlin, all alone and tired.

As Arthur reached the edge of the forest, he suddenly remembered a beautiful place where he had once found his servant. The Prince didn't hesitate and started walking, knowing he should have thought of the location sooner. At the time, it had seemed so important and Arthur only realized now that he had never asked Merlin why he went to that spot. Then again, Merlin really did not tell Arthur that much about his personal life. At times, Arthur even wondered if he even knew Merlin all that well. He seemed to carry so many secrets and now, with his miraculous return, another mystery had been added.

Reaching the lake, with the astonishing view of the mountains, Arthur's gaze fell upon Merlin who stood near the water. His feet were bare and wet as the grass surrounding them was still damp. His clothes were dirty and Arthur could only guess Merlin had been walking through the forest all night.

"Merlin?" Arthur asked carefully. He walked closer towards him, seeing how his skin had regained some color. Merlin's gaze seemed distant, however, as if he wasn't really there. "Merlin?" This time, his voice was a little louder.

"It was too loud," Merlin's voice was soft, barely audible, "I couldn't stand it."

"It's very peaceful here," Arthur said admittedly. He could understand why Merlin would come here if he wanted to clear his mind. He noticed all the small details around him like the white tops of mountains in the distance and the soft color of the forest behind them. The water of the lake looked icy, but the sunlight made it shine brilliantly.

Merlin smiled faintly, closing his eyes and sighing deeply. An expression of pain crossed his face once more and it send shivers down Arthur's spine. He hated to see Merlin like this and he wished he could something, _anything_ to make him feel better.

"What happened to you?" Arthur took another step forward. He stood next to Merlin now, but he did not look at him directly. In stead, he gazed ahead, watching the sun rise higher into the early morning sky.

Merlin raised his hand and placed where his skin had been stitched by Gaius. He slowly opened his eyes, but he never looked at Arthur who thought it to be odd. Merlin almost seemed to avoid him and it made Arthur believe that Merlin _couldn't_ look at him anymore. Again, guilt flared up in his chest. If he had been faster, if he had fought better, he might have been able to save Merlin. They wouldn't be standing here then.

"I fell," Merlin spoke softly, "the sword pierced my body and I fell." Merlin's gaze became distant, his mind completely occupied with the memory. "I kept on falling, Arthur," only now did he turn his head, his gaze locking with the Prince's and his eyes shone with tears, "it was so bright, too _bright_, but I couldn't close my eyes. It was like falling through space, only I wasn't."

Arthur frowned. He tried to make sense out of it all, to understand what exactly Merlin had gone through, but it was so difficult to imagine it all. He remained silent, not wanting to disturb Merlin.

"I fell through time. I saw what has already been, I saw what is and all that must yet come to pass." Merlin let his gaze fall down, tears escaping the corners of his eyes now and they rolled down his cheeks. "I saw so much, Arthur," his voice became a gently whisper, "and I can not bare it." His trembling hands moved to his hand, his fingers finding there way through his short black hair. "It never stops," he shook his head as if he tried to shake the images from his mind, "time never _ends_."

"You're not alone," Arthur wasn't sure what words he could use to make Merlin feel a little better. He only knew he had to say something. "We will help you."

"You can't." Merlin's eyes flew open.

For a moment, Arthur could have sworn they had changed color, perhaps golden, but when he looked a little closer, all that he saw was the familiar blue eyes of the man he trusted, the man he wanted to help at any cost.

"You have to let us try," Arthur wasn't going to give up. He was too stubborn for that.

Merlin suddenly extended his hand, reaching out for Arthur to take it. "Trust me," he said.

Arthur swallowed heavily. He didn't understand what Merlin wanted him to do, but he extended his hand as well, the tips of his finger touching Merlin's.

A flash completely caught Arthur off guard. He stumbled back, his head filled with thousands of images. People he didn't know, events that could not possibly have happened yet. It was all very vague, as if he was watching it happen from a great distance, but then it became sharper, closer. Arthur recognized Gwen. She stood in a crowd, her cheeks wet with tears. He saw Gaius who looked broken and tired. And then he saw himself standing next to his father. His gaze was empty, his lips pressed together until they were nothing more than two thin lines.

Arthur tried to push away the image. It burned inside of him as if he stood in the middle of flames. Only then did he realize that he actually stood surrounded by fire and all the eyes of the crowd were directed at him. His body felt alien, however, not his, and Arthur looked down, recognizing Merlin's torn clothes.

Arthur screamed, but no sound came out. A soft touch suddenly pushed it all back and when Arthur opened his eyes again, he found himself laying on the ground, his nails buried deep into his skin. Merlin stood next to him, his gaze deeply sad and Arthur knew that all that he had just seen, Merlin had seen as well.

And not just his own death, Arthur fully realized, everyone's. Merlin had seen _everything_.

"It does not ever stop," Merlin whispered, his eyes wide and his hands shaking, "it will all happen and there is nothing we can do about."

**AN: I know it is a short chapter, but what a scene, right? I loved writing this and I hope you all enjoyed reading it!**

**Leave me a (kind) message because I love those as well :)**


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Merlin characters.

Summary: When Arthur loses Merlin during a battle, he feels lost and guilty. As everyone is trying to understand that Merlin will not come back, they are stunned to find he has come back. Merlin has changed, however, and his friends try to help him. Will everything be alright?

AN: Any and all mistakes are completely my own. I am so glad the previous chapter was liked so much! Thanks for the awesome reviews :)

**- Tears of an Angel -**

**Chapter 7  
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As Arthur guided Merlin through the halls of the castle, he couldn't help noticing the silence that hung between him and Merlin. The young servant used to be so chatty, always talking about the most idiotic subjects possible. When Arthur looked at Merlin now, however, he only saw a absent gaze in his eyes. He knew the young man was currently seeing things, visions of what the future held for them.

Arthur sighed deeply, guiding Merlin up the stairs and towards Gaius' personal chambers. He could no longer stand the silence, however, or bear the secrets that divided them. Arthur decided that he still had one option. He could ask for the truth.

"Why are you back?" He turned to stand before Merlin just as they were about to enter Gaius' chambers. His gaze was stern, demanding Merlin to look at him. "Why did you come back from the dead?" He needed answers, he needed to make sense out of all this before he would lose his mind pondering over all the possibilities.

Merlin's eyes still remained distant, absent, but his body tensed, indicating that he had heard Arthur's question. "I did not choose this," his voice was very soft, "no man would choose this."

"So you don't know why you are back," Arthur said. He couldn't help but feel disappointed.

Merlin suddenly started to blink very rapidly, as if he was trying to get something out of his eyes. Arthur immediately understood that a vision was troubling him at this very moment and he still found it odd that he just stood there. Sorcerer should be executed since they were evil and now Merlin was someone who could see the future. _He_ should be executed as well, but Arthur was protecting him in stead.

"I have a destiny," Merlin suddenly spoke, his voice low, "one I must not fail in." His gaze finally lifted to meet Arthur's. "You need me, like I need you. You will become the greatest King Camelot has ever known." He closed his eyes.

"Is that what you are seeing right now?" Arthur asked. He knew it could not be a positive thing to know your own future, but his curiosity took the better of him.

"I see you," Merlin whispered, his eyes still shut, "and I see betrayal, pain." His voice shook as he opened his eyes, his breath short and rasping. "I see so much, Arthur. I have seen your life and I have seen your death."

Arthur reached out for Merlin's arm, suddenly feeling very frightened. He had never seen Merlin like this and he certainly didn't like the idea of knowing his own death. No man should know this, Arthur now understood, and neither should Merlin.

Merlin gazed into Arthur's eyes, tears flooding his eyes. "Make it stop, Arthur," Merlin begged of him, "please, make it stop." Suddenly, his legs could no longer bear the weight and Merlin slid down the wall, his arms craddling his chest.

"Make it stop," he cried softly, "I can not bear this any longer." And then his gaze became distant once more and Arthur knew that visions were again clouding his mind.

The young Prince felt completely and utterly useless. There was nothing he could do to help Merlin and he found himself frozen. Merlin appeared so small before him, so fragile as if he could break apart in a million different pieces and Arthur could do absolutely nothing about it.

-o-o-

Arthur leaned back in his chair, sighing heavily. He had been spending so much time in Gaius' chambers recently that he was starting to forget the smell and image of his own chambers. He longed for his bed, for some proper rest, but of course he would not get any before Merlin would at least be better. Arthur refused to leave his servant's side, much to Uther's dismay.

The door of Merlin's bedchamber opened, Gaius stepping down the steps and carefully closing the door behind him, not wanting to wake Merlin who had finally fallen asleep. The wound in his stomach had already healed completely, but exhaustion was destroying his body and spirit.

"How is he?" Lancelot asked. He was pacing up and down the chamber, his arms crossed before his chest, his eyes speaking nothing but worry.

"I'm starting to believe," Gaius sounded desperate, "that not even in his sleep, Merlin can find rest from the visions. He sees them even now. I have given him a sleeping draft, but he remains restless."

Arthur noticed how tired Gaius appeared, but he knew the physician would not rest either before Merlin would be getting better. None of them would be getting any rest.

"There must be something we can do," Lancelot exclaimed, frustration in his voice. He gazed at Gaius for a very short moment, but a meaningful glare was exchanged, one Arthur had seen very clearly.

He suddenly remembered the conversation he had overheard only hours ago and a bitterness suddenly filled him. He thought he had at least proven himself trustworthy when he had protected Merlin from his own father! All that he wanted, was to help Merlin, but still he was being left out. Still they did not trust him.

"What is it," Arthur blurted out, "what is it you two know, but I don't?" He let his gaze slide from Lancelot to Gaius and back again. A silence hung between them, but the Prince refused to break it.

"It's about Merlin," Lancelot started.

Arthur had figured as much, but he wanted to know details. He watched how Gaius folded his hands in his lap, almost appearing defeated."What about him?"

"He-" Lancelot swallowed heavily, hesitating for a moment, "he is a sorcerer."

Arthur pressed his lips together. He already knew that Merlin possessed magic since his return from the dead. How else would he be getting the visions? What Arthur could not believe, was that Lancelot would try and lie to him about this. He only wanted the truth for once. "He sees the future," Arthur said through clenched teeth, feeling angry, "of course he possessed magic now. That is not his fault, however, and I thought you would trust me by now."

"You don't understand," Gaius spoke gently, his gaze directed at his hands, "Merlin has always been a sorcerer."

Arthur let the words soak in. He had imagined much, but this he had not expected. He parted his lips, wanted to say something, but his mind came up empty..

"He was born with magic," Gaius continued to explain, looking up to meet Arthur's blue eyes, "it is a part of him like royal blood is a part of you. He is a good boy," he said with determination, clearly proud of him, "and he has done noting but goodness in his life."

"He isn't evil, Arthur," Lancelot said, "he is our loyal friend who would die for us. I would die for him."

"He did die," Arthur found his voice soft, barely audible, "and he came back which means, then, that he is powerful."

"He is," Gaius said, "and he has saved us many times. It is his destiny to protect you, Arthur, and perhaps he has not yet fulfilled it. Perhaps that is why he has returned."

"If he is so powerful," Arthur said, trying to understand it all, "then why doesn't he save himself?"

Gaius shifted his weight uncomfortable. "It is never that easy," he said eventually, "but I know someone who might have answers. The Dragon could help us."

"The Drag-" Arthur couldn't not believe this. He tried to remain in control over his emotions, but he still felt completely stunned. "You are saying that we must go to the Dragon who has been chained in the dungeons for twenty years?" The mere thought send shivers down his back. Surely the Dragon would kill them on sight!

"The Dragon is evil," Arthur said, "he is cruel and vicious and surely would want to see Camelot destroyed. Why would he help us?"

"Because," Gaius explained, "Merlin has seen the Dragon many times and he has helped Camelot before. He knows Merlin is important to the future and he will not have any choice but to help."

"This is madness," Arthur whispered in a hard voice.

"It is," Lancelot agreed, "but it is also our only hope. If we want to help Merlin, we must go to him."

Arthur cursed under his breath. He hated this plan, but Lancelot was right. This was their only chance and Arthur would take it. He would do anything to help Merlin at this point. He had lost him once and he certainly wasn't going to stand around and watch him lose his mind now.


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any of the Merlin characters.

**Summary:** When Arthur loses Merlin during a battle, he feels lost and guilty. As everyone is trying to understand that Merlin will not come back, they are stunned to find he has come back. Merlin has changed, however, and his friends try to help him. Will everything be alright?

**AN: **Any and all mistakes are completely my own. This will be a longer chapter. I could have parted it in two, but I felt it worked better together. I hope that is not a bad thing. My only hope is that this will be enjoyed.

**- Tears of an Angel -**

**Chapter 8**

Arthur stood at the top of the steps. He could still turn around, choose to walk away from this place, but of course Arthur knew he wouldn't. Not only would he not be able to live with himself, none of his friends would be able to forgive him. He had to do this for Merlin and Arthur found himself lucky that he wasn't alone. He glanced back, seeing Lancelot look at him with big brown eyes, waiting on the Prince to descend.

"What do you think he is like?" Arthur asked. His hand held onto his sword firmly though Arthur didn't really know why. He wasn't in any danger, at least not yet. He felt scared, however, not knowing what to expect and he wondered how Lancelot could appear so calm, relaxed even.

"Angry?" Lancelot suggested. As Arthur looked into his eyes, he could see that Lancelot actually felt the same as him. Scared, not knowing what the next few moments would bring.

Arthur sucked in a deep breath. "Let's go," he said. The entire way down, taking each step carefully, Arthur did not release his grip on his sword. He was ready for anything, for any attack. Knowing that Lancelot was with him gave him some comfort. He was not alone after all. When he reached the end of the stairwell, he found himself standing on a little platform. It was just big enough for the two men to stand on and Arthur let his gaze wander around the cave. It was enormous down here and it made him wonder how big the Dragon actually was. Of course he had heard the many stories, but he had never seen the Dragon before. His father had forbidden him to ever come down here. "He is not here," Arthur said, seeing nothing but an empty cave.

"He must be here," Lancelot said. He seemed impressed by the large space as well, his gaze wide and his lips slightly parted. His body tensed at every sound, however, betraying the unease that had taken a hold of him.

"Hello?" called Arthur. His voice echoed off the damp walls. The flapping of wings made him take a step back. The Dragon even _sounded_ enormous and Arthur couldn't help but look at his sword. He suddenly felt very silly holding it. High above, a large shadow appeared and only a few seconds later did the Dragon fly into view. He landed just before the two men, his wings folding back into place and his large teeth exposed as he seemingly wore a large smile.

"Arthur Pendragon," the Dragon said, sounding amused, "and Lancelot, the boy who wants to be a Knight."

Arthur swallowed heavily. Now he was certain his sword was useless. The Dragon was his enemy and Arthur had to fight the urge to attack, to fight, or to simply run away. He remained standing as tall as possible, however, knowing that he needed to help Merlin. He had to do this for his friend. "I am here because-"

"I know why you are here, young Pendragon," the Dragon's smile had disappeared, his eyes having turned serious. He tilted his head slightly, breathing out slowly. Arthur could feel his warm breath on his skin, but he did not back away. The Dragon continued to speak then. "You are here," he said, "because of Merlin."

"He needs help," Arthur told him. He tried to sound powerful, strong, but he couldn't help thinking that he must sound so small in comparison with the Dragon. "I am told you can help him."

"Are _you_ asking for my help?" The Dragon's eyes became large, awaiting Arthur's response. "Not once in your very short life have you come down here. Why would I help you." The Dragon's voice as cold and hard.

The Prince wasn't sure what the Dragon meant or what he wanted to hear. "For Merlin," he answered, "I am asking for your help because Merlin is..." When Arthur came to think of it, he came to the realization that he didn't know what Merlin was exactly. Was he ill? Dying? "Merlin needs help," he eventually said.

"I can not help him," the Dragon said casually. He didn't even seem troubled or concerned. Then again, Arthur thought, why would the Dragon care for Merlin? Why would they have thought the Dragon would want to help Merlin? "I want to help the young warlock, but this is magic beyond my power," the Dragon explained.

"You know so much," Arthur refused to believe a word the Dragon said, "but not this. You are lying."

"I am not a liar," the Dragon scowled. Hot fire escaped from deep withing his throat, but because he was looking up at that point, the fire did not hurt Arthur or Lancelot. The two men waiting until the Dragon had calmed again, but they refused to leave already. They hadn't gotten any answers and they would not leave this cave before they had been told _something_.

"Merlin has seen all that will come to pass," the Dragon said after a long moment of silence. "You have spoken to him, Arthur Pendragon, and he had showed you what will happen. I can not stop that which is bound to happen."

Arthur frowned. "Why is it that every word that escapes from your lips, is a riddle?"

At that, the Dragon chuckled. "You will become a great King," he said, "one that will unite all of Albion. Merlin has told you this already, has he not?"

"He said I would be the greatest King Camelot will have ever known," Arthur sighed. This should please him, make him feel worthy of the throne. In stead, all that Arthur could think of was the moment that had followed Merlin's reveal. Arthur remembered how the young man had crumbled to the floor, how he had felt broken and shattered and how he had told the Prince that he could no longer bear it.

"And he has already helped you with that," the Dragon spoke slowly, as if every word mattered now, "he has protected you through your many journeys and quests. Do you not understand, Arthur, do you not see?"

Arthur felt annoyed. Again the riddles. He started to wonder if all magical people and creatures had a gift for speaking in such a manner. "Tell me," he said, "tell me what you mean."

The Dragon moved his body closer to the Prince. "I mean," he said, his golden eyes watching Arthur closely, "that you are the reason Merlin has come back."

Arthur swallowed heavily. The mere thought made him feel sick. If he was the reason, then this meant Merlin was in this mess because of him. Then Arthur had caused him this agony. The Prince refused to believe this. This was a trick, the Dragon was tricking him! "That can't be true," Arthur said, anger audible through his voice, "I did not make him come back and-"

"Of course not," The Dragon laughed at that idea. "You have no such power. You are a mortal, nothing more."

"But Merlin is magic," Lancelot spoke for the first time.

The Dragon's gaze instantly fell on the young man. "Finally," the Dragon said, "a man smart enough to make the right conclusions."

"What?" Arthur turned towards Lancelot. "What is he talking about?"

"His magic, Arthur," Lancelot said, still trying to work it all out, "he is powerful. You have never seen it, but Merlin is powerful."

"He is," the Dragon agreed. "The day he died, you, Arthur Pendragon, must have been his last thought. He knew he had not yet completed his destiny, that you still need protection and guidance towards your own destiny as King." The Dragon straightened his back, sighing heavily. "Merlin chose to come back-"

"No!" Arthur would not hear these words. Merlin had told him himself: he had not chosen this. '_No man would choose this_.' Those had been his exact words.

"I am sorry, Arthur," the Dragon said, "but it is true. Merlin choose this, albeit unwillingly. When he died, he knew you would be left alone and he could not bear that thought. His magic is what brought him back, but that which is dead, should remain dead."

"This means nothing," Arthur closed his eyes for a moment, needing to process all of this. "It doesn't tell us how to save him."

"I have already told you," the Dragon sounded annoyed, "I can not help him. Merlin has seen the future, however. If there is one man who knows how to save him, it _is_ Merlin."

"Again with the riddles," Arthur snapped. He suddenly realized how easy he had fallen into a pattern with the Dragon. He would never feel comfortable around him, but he no longer feared him either.

"Merlin knows the answer," the Dragon explained, "and I am sure he has already told you how to save him."

Silence.

Arthur's mind raced, his thoughts shifting in his head. He tried to remember every detail of every conversation he's had with Merlin since his return, but nothing seemed to make sense. Merlin never did tell him the answer. The Prince bit his lip, pushing down his anger. Why couldn't anyone simply give him a straight answer or show him what was supposed to-

_Oh_.

"Arthur?" Lancelot sounded concerned, knowing the gaze that currently filled the Prince's face.

"He has shown me," Arthur said breathlessly, "Merlin showed me."

"Showed you what?" Lancelot asked.

"What will come to pass," the Dragon said, "what must happen."

"No," Arthur took a step away from the Dragon. He refused to agree to this. "I will not stand by and watch Merlin burn."

Horror filled Lancelot's eyes. "What?"

"He showed me how we would all stand around, doing nothing as he burned," Arthur explained, bile rising in his throat, "but I won't let that happen."

"It is what must happen," the Dragon said sternly, "I told you I do not have the power to help Merlin. The flames, however, they can burn away the visions. The magic can be consumed by flames. That is why your father chooses to burn every warlock and witch he comes across."

Arthur shook his head. "Merlin. Will. Not. Burn."

"There is no use for it," Lancelot told the Dragon, agreeing with the Prince. "Or he dies by his visions or he dies by the fire. It hardly seems a fair choice. He dies an agonizing death anyway."

"Merlin has died and come back," the Dragon said, "it would be foolish to kill him again."

"Why do keep doing that?" Arthur demanded to know, throwing his arms into the air. "Nothing you say makes sense!"

The Dragon smirked, taking Arthur's words as a complement. "Merlin must burn," he said, having turned serious again, "there is no doubt that it is his future as Merlin has seen it himself. The flames will cure him of the visions and _then_, only thenhe can be saved."

"He'd still be in agony," Lancelot said, seemingly having understood what Arthur had not. Lancelot turned to the Prince, panic in his eyes. "He'd be in the flames long enough for the visions to be burned away and then we must put out the fire. He'd be burned severely, but his visions would be gone."

"Unless, Arthur Pendragon" the Dragon called back the attention of the young Prince standing before him, "you accept the help of those that you have sworn to be your enemy."

Arthur took in a deep breath. "Many are my enemy."

"The Druids, young Pendragon," the Dragon said, "the Druids will be Merlin's only hope."

-o-o-

Gaius knew he had other patients that needed his attention. There was Sir Aulfric that had a dangerous cough. A poor woman downtown had a nasty infection on her leg and the local tavern-keeper kept complaining about dizziness. It all seemed so insignificant compared to Merlin, Gaius thought. He didn't want to leave his chambers, he didn't want to leave Merlin's side, but he had no other choice. He collected his herbs and little bottles of medicine that he would have to take with him.

Turning around, he was startled as he had not expected Merlin standing directly before him. The flask he had still been holding slipped from his grasp, crashing into the floor beneath him. The blue substance splattered across the stones and the glass lay broken before Gaius' feet. "Damn it," Gaius cursed. He quickly bit his tongue. He shouldn't be uttering this language before Merlin.

"I knew that would happen," Merlin said rather stoical.

Gaius sighed in annoyance. "Couldn't you have prevented it then?"

"I can not change what must happen," Merlin took a step back from Gaius, gazing into his eyes, "I am starting to understand that now. I can not change anything."

"You seem better," Gaius said, smiling faintly. He had not seen Merlin like this in a long time. The young warlock almost seemed healthy. He still wore dark circles underneath his eyes, but his skin had regained some color and he appeared stronger, more focused.

Merlin's eyes suddenly changed color. Blue became gold and the shards of the flask rose into the air, melting together once again. The blue substance collected itself and in the blink of an eye, the bottle became whole again, holding together the blue medicine. Gaius' fingers clasped around the flask, grabbing it out of the air. He felt concerned again as he had never seen Merlin do something like this. He had not even muttered a single words from the Ancient Language.

"Perhaps you should rest," Gaius suggested. He placed down the flask, but when he looked at Merlin again, he found him standing further away from him. "Merlin?"

"I can not rest," Merlin whispered, "not ever. My mind," his hands reached for his head, but his eyes stayed wide open, fixed on Gaius, "it is filled with images."

Gaius swallowed heavily. "We'll soon have answers," he assured the young man, "Arthur-"

"He can't do it," Merlin interrupted Gaius, his eyes suddenly nothing more than two thin lines, "he is not meant to do it either."

Gaius frowned. He had no idea what Merlin was talking about.

"I showed him my future," Merlin explained, dropping his hands again, "but he will try and prevent it." Merlin's eyes became distant suddenly, drifting away, but he quickly focused back on Gaius. "Arthur will not burn me."

"Of course he won't!" The mere thought send shivers down Gaius' back. "Don't talk like that. Don't say that!"

"You don't understand, Gaius," Merlin sighed. There was a fragility to his voice, one that betrayed how much he was _not_ in control. "It is what must happen. I can't do this any longer. The visions are becoming too strong."

"You will be fine," Gaius told him. He took a step closer towards Merlin and he felt relief when seeing that Merlin did not move back again. He needed to make Merlin understand, though, he needed him to know that they would not give up. "You are strong and you can beat this."

Merlin shook his head. "I see a man," he suddenly said, his eyes focused on something Gaius could not see, "he is running so fast through the forest. His clothes are torn and he tired. He feels scared, Gaius, he is all alone and he is being chased." Merlin screamed as long and deep gashed appeared on his arms and torso.

And they disappeared again.

"The beast killed him," Merlin spoke through his tears. He closed his eyes and gasped for breath. "I see a young girl. She is beautiful, Gaius. She has long golden hair and green eyes. She tries to smile, but she doesn't have the strength. She's sick and she can't breathe and she is terrified." Merlin coughed wildly, blood dripping from his tongue and lips.

Gaius pushed back his tears. He hated witnessing this. He felt completely useless as there was nothing he could do. He only wished for Merlin to stop.

Merlin's breathing steadied again and his eyes opened. "She died," he whispered.

"Merlin..." Gaius wanted to say something, anything, but his mind came up empty. All that he could think of was the blood that still stained Merlin skin and shirt.

"I will feel every death in the end," Merlin said, his voice shaking, "I will not survive much longer, but this can end. The visions must end."

"By fire," Gaius understood now, "you must burn, but Arthur won't do it."

It seemed Merlin wanted to smile, but his lips barely moved. "It must happen," he said, "it _will_ happen. There is no other choice." He took a step back and raised his hands, glaring at them as if they were alien. For a short second, he gazed back at Gaius and now he did smile fully, the smile reaching all the way up to his eyes. "I can finally see this end, Gaius," he said, "no more visions."

"Merlin, what are you going to do?" Gaius demanded to know, but he only witnessed how Merlin disappeared into thin air. Fear took a hold of the old physician, and panic. He didn't know what would happen, but he knew how it would end. Merlin would burn and he couldn't do anything about it.

-o-o-

Merlin felt a pull in the back of his head. The image of Gaius standing before him vanished and a new environment started to take form. He saw large cold walls, windows that allowed sunlight to enter the chamber. One long table stood in the middle, papers and maps scattered across them.

There was only one man present.

"Uther," Merlin said, his eyes connecting with the King's.

Uther rose from his chair, his eyes wide and filled with anger. "You," he spat, "and _magic_!"

Merlin smiled and did nothing as the King called for guards. And then his smile disappeared and visions clouded his mind again. He couldn't think straight, he could hardly breath and Merlin let the visions take a hold of him. After all, this would soon end.


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Merlin characters.**

**Summary**: When Arthur loses Merlin during a battle, he feels lost and guilty. As everyone is trying to understand that Merlin will not come back, they are stunned to find he has come back. Merlin has changed, however, and his friends try to help him. Will everything be alright?

**AN**: Any and all mistakes are completely my own. After what has been a longer chapter, this one will be a little shorter again. Don't worry, lots will happen! I want to thank everyone who reviewed, added this to their favourites or who alerted this. Thanks you SO much!

**- Tears of an Angel -**

**Chapter 9**

Arthur and Lancelot ran up the small stairs, having gotten some answers from the Dragon, but still, they felt like nothing had really changed. Arthur had hoped to learn of another way to help Merlin, but the Dragon had not been able to help them with that. The image of Merlin burning on a pile of fire made Arthur's stomach turn. He had watched many die that way, but this was _Merlin_. His goofy servant that had always been loyal to him.

"What will you do?" Lancelot suddenly asked.

Arthur had forgotten he wasn't alone. When reaching the end of the stairs, he turned on his heels and faced the Knight. He could see he was worried as well and Arthur could understand perfectly. He, too, was very worried. "You heard what the Dragon said," Arthur told him, "I must accept help from the Druids."

"And where will you find them?"

Lancelot seemed to point out all the difficulties in their plan and it annoyed Arthur. The Prince just wanted to help Merlin, nothing more or less. Why did everything had to be so complicated? "They have camps in the woods," Arthur said, thinking quickly, "I'll send some men to find them."

"I will go," Lancelot offered, "it'll be faster and you know you can trust me."

Arthur thought about it for a second, but Lancelot was right. He was a good tracker, far better than anyone else in the castle, and Arthur could indeed trust him. He'd trust him with his life and he also knew that Lancelot would not give up. Merlin was his friend as well, after all, and they had been close ever since Lancelot had arrived in Camelot that first day. "Hurry," Arthur could only tell him, "Merlin doesn't have much time."

A faint smile filled Lancelot's face. "I will not disappoint you," he swore, "I will not disappoint Merlin."

Arthur only nodded before watching Lancelot walk away from him. The Prince could only inhale deeply. With Lancelot off to find the Druids, Arthur would have to make sure that Merlin was safe until then. He didn't hesitate and headed towards Gaius' chambers, noticing how the guards were on extreme alert. Every noise they heard, every movement they saw, had them reaching for their swords.

Arthur didn't have time to pay them any more attention, however. He needed to speak to Gaius as soon as possible and he could only hope that the physician was present in his chambers. Then again, where else would he be around these times? Merlin needed his full attention.

Turning into the last hallway, he reached the personal chambers and entered, not even bothering to knock. He found Gaius sitting at his table, in his hands a flask of medicine that had the most peculiar blue color. Gaius gazed up, his eyes expectantly, but disappointment soon took control when he saw it was the Prince who had entered.

"Gaius?" Arthur could feel fear flood him. "What happened?"

Gaius set the flask on the table and rose from his seat, gazing directly into Arthur's eyes. He remained silent for a few moments, clearly thinking about what he could say, but he simply said: "Merlin is gone. I suppose he's in a cell at the moment, awaiting his execution in the morning."

"_What_?" Arthur was shocked. He hadn't been gone that long, had he? Why was everything falling apart the moment he turned his back? Why was Merlin being so utterly stupid? The Prince sighed deeply and tried to regain his composure, but he couldn't hide his anger. He was sure, though, Merlin had planned this. "What did he do?"

Gaius swallowed heavily. "One moment he stood before me," he explained, sadness in his voice, "and then he disappeared. Judging by the commotion in the castle, I suspect he has gone to see the King."

"_He did WHAT_?" Arthur still couldn't believe this. He was doing everything he could here to try and save that boy and Merlin went along and destroyed everything. He should have tied him to his bed! Although that wouldn't have done any good because Merlin would just use his magic to escape. Arthur deeply wished for everything to return to normal now.

"I'm sorry, Sire," Gaius said, "I should have stopped him, I should have-"

"Gaius," Arthur quickly said, "this isn't your fault. I suppose that if anyone knows what he's doing, it's Merlin."

Gaius slowly nodded. "Have you find a cure?" he suddenly asked, only now remembering that Arthur had gone to see the Dragon.

"The Dragon said what Merlin already told us," Arthur sighed, "that only fire can drive out the visions. However," at least there was some hope, Arthur thought, "he also told us that the Druids might be able to save Merlin afterwards. Lancelot has gone to find them, but he doesn't have much time now that Merlin..." He couldn't bring himself to finish his sentence. He took a step closer towards Gaius and looked into his eyes, needing to see the truth in there. "Do you think everything will be alright?"

There was a hesitation in the physician's eyes and Arthur had not missed it. "He'll be fine," Gaius said after a short moment of silence, "this is Merlin we're talking about. He has a way about him."

Arthur chuckled softly. "He certainly does."

-o-o-

Lancelot walked for hours. He had lost track of time once he had left the castle of Camelot behind him. He had rather stayed, of course, made sure that Merlin was alright, but he knew he was needed elsewhere. Arthur needed him to do this. Finding the Druids would proof not to be an easy task, though, but Lancelot was stubborn. He would not rest before he had found those that could help him.

The Druids, however, were magic. Living in Camelot couldn't possibly be easy for them and so they would have protection set up around their camp. Perhaps spells that would kill any intruder? Or just torture them or scare them away? Lancelot refused to think about these possibilities. He needed to find them, that was all.

As he walked through the forest, trying to find any sign of human life, he couldn't help thinking that time was slipping away from him. He was wasting precious minutes that Merlin did not have. He needed to find the Druids now, but that would only be half his task. Getting them to come with him was a whole other side of the job. He would be asking them to walk into enemy territory, to walk right before Uther and take Merlin with them.

It was madness and Lancelot would actually understand if the Druids refused. But still, he could not give up. Merlin needed his help and he needed to hurry. Crossing a creek, the Knight found first sign of life as he heard a child cry out in laughter. Still, that could be anyone. It could even be outlaws that would kill him without a second thought. Lancelot advanced with care, his sword still in his belt, but his hand resting on the hilt of it. In a very quick second, he could draw it out and defend himself if necessary.

The laughter of the child became louder and Lancelot had to cross another small creek to actually see the young girl running around, chasing what appeared to be a small dog. A little to the girl's left, was another girl, a young woman, who Lancelot estimated to be around twenty years old. They had both blond curls and soft brown eyes which made the Knight wonder if they were sisters.

Stepping into sight, he could feel their gazes fall upon him. "Hello," Lancelot greeted them, knowing that he still had to be careful. The young girl only appeared around eight years old, but if she belonged with the Druids, then she had magic. The same went for the young woman. "I'm looking for the Druids."

The girls said nothing, only gazed at the Knight and then turned to look at each other. The youngest of the two hurried away, disappearing in the bushes, but the eldest remained where she stood, her gaze intently on Lancelot. "What is your business here?" she asked. Her voice was stern and soft at the same time.

"I am looking for help," Lancelot answered, still not sure if he could trust her. Then again, she was certainly not trusting him. "A friend of mine, he needs-"

_'Emrys.'_

Lancelot nearly jumped twenty feet in the air as he heard the voice inside his head. He turned around, finding a young man with bright, red hair and intense, green eyes. For his young age, he looked wise and Lancelot couldn't help but see a resemblance with Merlin. He too had wisdom in his eyes, too much wisdom for his age.

"My friend's name is Merlin," Lancelot told the young man, "and he needs your help."

_'We know him as Emrys,'_ the young man said in Lancelot's mind, _'a great and powerful warlock who believes Albion can be united under Arthur Pendragon's reign.'_

Lancelot swallowed heavily. He wasn't sure if Merlin's intentions were a good or a bad thing for these Druids. "He only wants what is best," he spoke loud and clearly, "he has sacrificed much and now he needs your help." The young man's gaze was still upon him, making Lancelot feel more and more uneasy. "My name is-"

_'Lancelot,'_ the young man finished his sentence, _'and my name is Alec Iseldirson.'_

"Could you..." Lancelot didn't want to sound disrespectful, but he had to ask anyway, "not talk in my head?"

A warm smile filled Alec's face, his green eyes brightening even more. "I have heard what has happened to Merlin," Alec spoke out loud, much to Lancelot's relief, "I have felt it. The day he returned from the Dead, magic was...disturbed, out of balance."

Lancelot nodded. "He has visions," he told Alec, "and he cannot bear them. Only fire can save him, but that will also kill him. I am here to ask your help in saving Merlin from that."

Alec let his gaze slide towards the girl that still stood behind Lancelot and the Knight cursed himself for having forgotten about her. The way they looked at each other, made it clear that they were having a silent conversation, one that wasn't meant for Lancelot's ears.

"Annabeth believes that Merlin should not have come back," Alec explained, focusing back on Lancelot, "that he should have remained dead and that perhaps, he should die again."

"And what do you believe?" Lancelot asked.

"That Emrys is a great warlock," Alec smiled almost sadly, "but that not even the most powerful ones can know what the _entire_ future holds. I believe in him, however, for he has done great deeds. He has saved those that are innocent and he has aided those who needed it."

Lancelot took a step towards Alec. "So you will help him?"

Alec nodded.

-o-o-

Merlin seemed to have found peace in his mind. The visions had become numb, like they were playing a distance away and Merlin couldn't fully see them anymore. They were still very much present and it was difficult for the young sorcerer to focus on anything else. Every time he heard someone screaming or crying, he turned to gaze outside of his cell, only to come to the conclusion that someone had screamed inside his head, inside a vision.

"Merlin?"

Merlin didn't turn his head this time. He only gazed ahead, trying to focus on blocking out the visions, but the image of a young boy drowning made his eyes fill with tears. He was such a young child, not even four years old, but he had somehow fallen into the lake and there was no one around to save him.

"_Merlin_?"

Another vision replaced the one of the drowning boy, but Merlin found enough strength within him to see who was calling out his name. Arthur stood on the other side of his cell, anger in his eyes and fear as well. It confused Merlin. He would have thought Arthur would be pleased. After all, now the Prince didn't have to make the decisions anymore, Merlin had done it for him.

"Hello, Arthur," Merlin said, his voice weak.

"What have you _done_?" Arthur asked softly. His hands clutched the iron bars, his head leaning against it as if defeated.

"Tomorrow it will end," Merlin said, sounding happy about it. He couldn't help but smile. "Tomorrow, I will finally be able to rest."

"No, Merlin," Arthur said angrily, "tomorrow, you'll die an agonizing death!" There was regret in Arthur's eyes, suddenly, regret for the harsh words he had just spoken.

Merlin gazed into Arthur's eyes and nodded. "And then it will all be over."

"Look into your visions," Arthur couldn't believe he was actually saying this. Everything he was doing, was to save Merlin from those images and now he was asking him to look at them. "What do you see? What will happen tomorrow?"

Merlin closed his eyes and his hands started to shake. A thousand visions came to him, a thousand voices and thoughts and screams. Merlin felt like his head was about to explode and so he forced open his eyes again, finding Arthur gazing at him intently. "It's so much," Merlin whispered, "many things will happen tomorrow."

"But what will happen to _you_?" Arthur asked. "Will Lancelot arrive on time? Will we be able to save you?"

Merlin smiled. "One way or another," he spoke slowly, "I'll be saved." He could focus just long enough before the visions took control of his mind again, to hear Arthur bang his foot against the iron in irritation. The Prince called out his name again, he begged him to stay focused, but Merlin couldn't. All that he could see was random people without names.

He couldn't wait until tomorrow would arrive.

**AN****: The chapter has ended. What did you think? I hope the characters weren't OOC. It was difficult to write Lancelot for some reason... Reviews please? Pretty please?**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Merlin, its characters or its magic. I wish I did though...

**AN:** I want to thank everyone who left me a oh-so-very kind review. They rocked my world. I am sorry that it took me so long before another update, but my finals are coming so that means a lot of studying... This chapter is rather short, but I will try and update as soon as possible! Pinky-promise!

Tears of an Angel Chapter 10

There was a silence in the air. One that hung low above Lancelot. Sure, there were birds and animals around them and the wind was racing through the leaves of the trees, but still, Lancelot could only describe what he was hearing as a silence. No one spoke and Lancelot didn't want to be the first one to break the silence. There was little to be said, after all. Alec and Annabeth were walking behind him and the Knight looked over his shoulder, his gaze instantly drawn to Alec's bright red hair that stood shining against the early morning sun.

Both Alec as Annabeth smiled at him and Lancelot quickly turned to look ahead again. For some reason, he didn't feel comfortable around that boy. He had no trouble with the girl, but there was something about Alec, something in the way he could _look_ at you with big, green eyes that seemed to gaze straight into your soul. Lancelot wasn't afraid of him, but the mere thought that he had magic, like Merlin, made him wonder. He knew Merlin was a good man, that he would never harm a soul, but did that count for this Alec? Could he really be trusted? Would he really help Merlin or was it all a trick?

It was different with Annabeth. She appeared more...normal. Less magical. She had insisted on coming along as well, not wanting to leave Alec alone with a Knight of Camelot and certainly not wanting to leave him alone when in the city of Camelot, right under the King's nose. The chance that they would be caught and executed themselves was very real of course. Lancelot couldn't blame her for wanting to stay with Alec, for wanting to protect him if necessary. She wasn't trusting Lancelot, though, like he was not trusting the Druids so it was a mutual feeling. What unnerved Lancelot was that the two could talk without him hearing it. For all he knew, they could be plotting at this very moment to kill him, or to kill Arthur or Uther as soon as they would reach Camelot. They could be plotting _anything_.

A shiver ran down Lancelot's back when these thoughts crossed his mind and without having realised, his hand had moved towards the hilt of his sword. He was ready to defend himself. He knew he was making a fool out of himself. There had never been any sign that Alec or Annabeth couldn't be trusted.

'_Do not be afraid,'_ Alec's voice suddenly rang crystal clear in Lancelot's mind, _'you can trust us.' _ His words seemed to echo through the Knights thoughts. Had he been hearing his thoughts? Or had he simply watched how he moved his hand closer to his sword?

Lancelot decided to turn on his heels, having come to a halt. His gaze connected with Alec's. For a long second, there was that heavy silence again, but Lancelot wanted answers. He wanted to understand, to know why they were actually helping him.

"Sorry," Alec smiled, "I keep forgetting you don't like me in your head."

"It's nothing personal," Lancelot said kindly. He watched Alec and Annabeth chuckle. "Look," he was tired of the secrets and hidden messages. "Merlin is facing a horrible death," he spoke slowly, "you are here to help him, right?" He expected Alec or Annabeth to assure him of their good intentions, but what they said, made him sigh silently. People with magic were known for their riddled speech.

"Merlin has a destiny," it was Annabeth who spoke, her face completely serious, "he must fulfil it. It's an honour that we can help him."

"How do you know him?" Lancelot asked. He wasn't in the mood for these riddles. He just wanted a straight answer. His gaze shifted between Annabeth's brown eyes and Alec's green ones. He had heard the stories about Emrys, of course. Merlin had once confided in him that he was known among the Druids, but never had Lancelot wondered how. How could they know about him, about his destiny, about his powers? They seemed to know more about Merlin than Lancelot did!

It was Alec who spoke. "There are stories about him," he walked forward and eventually passed Lancelot. The Knight followed him, walking by his side. "Our ancestors are known for their prophecies," Alec continued, "they warned us about the Great Purge, about Uther Pendragon and his hatred for magic." A warm smile then filled the young man's face. "They also spoke of a great, young man. His name would be Emrys and he would help Arthur Pendragon reach the throne. Together, they are to bring back magic to this land and unite it into Albion."

"Not everyone believes in this," Annabeth added as she walked just behind them, "some think that Emrys is just an invented person, to bring hope to the magical people. There are others who think that this Emrys won't bring back magic at all, that'll he'll only make it more hated in the end."

"Merlin would never-"

"He wouldn't make it more hated on purpose," Annabeth said in a matter-of-fact-way, shrugging. Lancelot was starting to believe that she was one of those that didn't believe in Emrys (or Merlin, whatever). "But he has more influence on Camelot than he thinks," she said, "from what I've heard, he has done many things. He has _killed_ Nimueh."

Lancelot had never heard that name before, but it sounded like someone important. Or at least important to Annabeth. "Nimueh?" he asked.

"She was a Priestess of the Old Religion," Alec explained, "very powerful, very important for magic. Merlin was stronger than her. Who knows what he set in motion that day. I believe, however," he threw Annabeth a quick glance, "that Emrys will bring about the return of magic."

"And you don't," Lancelot said, looking at Annabeth.

She nodded her head. "I don't believe one man can achieve this," she explained, "no matter how great his powers are."

"But you are willing to walk into Camelot for him anyway?" Lancelot was simply trying to understand. If she didn't believe in Merlin, then why was she risking so much for him? Again, he couldn't help thinking that something else was playing here, that the Druid boy and girl had another scheme planned. Of course, he could still be paranoid.

"I am not going to for Emrys," Annabeth said, "I am going for _Alec_."

Alec smiled lovingly at her. "I am glad you are coming," he told her, going to walk beside her now and gently taking her hand into his own, "because we are stronger together."

Lancelot watched how Alec planted a quick kiss on Annabeth's lips. It seemed like a fleeting moment, one that had passed within a second, but still, it had been intense, intimate. It made the Knight gaze away. He didn't want to intrude their small moment. It made his think of Gwen suddenly, but he shook those thoughts away. Now was not the time for thinking about her.

"Another two hours," Alec announced, "and we'll have reached Camelot."

-o-o-

Arthur had not slept. How could he? Lancelot wasn't back yet from his search for Druids and Merlin was down in a cell, awaiting his execution. Arthur felt completely and utterly useless. There was nothing he could do. For a moment, he considered breaking Merlin out himself, but that wouldn't work for numerous reasons. For one, there were more guards standing before his cell than the Prince thought Camelot had. Two, Merlin would probably not allow it to happen. He might use magic to keep the cell closed. Arthur only now realized that he had never seen the young servant perform magic. And three, where would he go with a man that could only see visions and barely keep himself standing. He might be able to get out of the castle, if he was lucky, but then what?

Merlin using magic was a thought the Prince still needing to grow familiar with. How could he not have noticed it? How could he have been so blind? He had spent so many time with Merlin, but never had he even suspected it. Perhaps he had been purposely oblivious. He had grown to like him, to see him as a loyal friend. Should he have discovered his magic a few weeks back, Arthur might have arrested him then and there. He would never know now. All that mattered, was that he was helping Merlin. Or at least he was trying to.

The sun had just peeked over the horizon, announcing a new day. _The_ day. It couldn't be, this couldn't be the day Merlin died. What if Lancelot didn't make it back in time? Was there anything Arthur would be able to do? Merlin wanted to die, he wanted the visions to end, the pain to stop. What if in the end, Arthur would be forced to let Merlin go? He had never thought it possible, but the thought of losing Merlin again, made tears come to his eyes. He inhaled deeply, instantly regaining control over his emotions. He had been taught this at a young age. After all, as the future King, Uther had told him once, he needed to be strong in any situation. You could never show weakness. Crying was definitely a weakness.

The doors of his chamber flew open, Morgana bursting in. Her eyes stood wide, worry filling them. She took a step closer to the Prince, his skin very pale. She was still wearing her night dress, though she wore a cloak over it. Arthur already knew why she was here. "Tell me I have misheard," she spoke harshly, "tell me Merlin isn't in a cell awaiting his execution."

"There is nothing I can do," Arthur told her, knowing that his words would sound insane. "Merlin will be executed. We can only hope that Lancelot will return in time to prevent his actual death."

A frown filled Morgana's face. "So there is a plan?" she wanted to know.

Arthur would have smiled at her, reassured her. His face remained almost emotionless, however, his eyes distant. "There is," he told her, "but it's not looking very good." A sigh escaped his lips.

"Tell me," Morgana lifted her chin. It was a movement Arthur had seen her do so many times. It was to make her appear taller, stronger, like she could take on the entire world. For a short moment, Arthur always thought that she could. She had a determination about her, like nothing could ever change her mind.

"The Druids can save him," Arthur explained, "and Lancelot has gone to find them. We can only hope they arrive in time to eventually end the fire."

Morgana swallowed heavily. "So," she hesitated, "he will burn?"

Arthur nodded. "He'll be here," he told her, "Lancelot has never disappointed us. He'll have found them and Merlin will be safe."

-o-o-

_A boy dying of an exotic illness. A woman dying during childbirth. A man getting lost in the woods, attacked by wolves. A baby crying with no one answering. An old woman lying in her bed, motionless. A girl tripping and falling hard, too hard. A young man in the forest, bitten by a poisonous spider. A butcher cutting his hand, hitting the artery in his wrist. A farmer coughing blood, his eyes becoming empty suddenly. A woman's heart giving out. A baby falling asleep, turning blue and then purple. A young woman falling from her horse. _Hundreds of people dying, every second, every moment that Merlin allowed himself to be swallowed by the visions. He couldn't fight it so why would he even try? It only pained him more.

When his cell opened, four guards entering, Merlin barely noticed it. Then two arms hoisted him upwards, but his legs barely could sustain his weight. Merlin forced himself to stand upwards, however. All that he could see were his visions, but the guards led him out of the cell and up the stairs. He didn't need to see his environment. When he stepped into the sunlight, he closed his eyes as the brightness hurt.

Around him, people started murmuring, whispering words that Merlin couldn't understand. He didn't want to understand. They were all probably mesmerized by his appearance. He had died after all, and then come back to life only to die again. Although...Merlin tried to force his visions, he tried to focus on one in particular. He found nothing, however, no vision of his own death. He did burn, people watching him with squinted eyes as the smoke rose higher. What came next was still clouded.

The guards pushed him up the pire, his hands suddenly pulled behind his back and tied around a long pole. He could easily use his magic to escape, but he didn't. This was what he wanted. This was what would end his misery, his pain. Just a little while longer, he told himself. The voice of Uther Pendragon echoed through the square, the people completely silenced. Merlin, his visions momentarily numbed, could see the faces around him. He could see Gaius, fear written in his eyes. He could see Gwen, tears already rolling down her cheeks. Morgana and Arthur stood above on a balcony. For a moment, he could have sworn he saw Arthur hold Morgana's hand, but then his visions returned and he was swallowed by the faces of a hundreds strangers.

A sudden heat rose beneath his feet. It started slowly, but smoke already surrounded him. This was it, he thought, this would be the end of it all. No more visions, no more death in his mind. The heat became more intense, reaching his feet and legs. The flames burned away his clothing and it licked his flesh, sending horrible, crucifying pain through his entire body. He screamed, he cried out. His magic tried to reach out, to make the flames die, but Merlin didn't allow it. The fire rose higher, reaching his hands and stomach. A thousand needles pierced his skin, ripping it open, burning his muscles.

But all that Merlin could think, was that it would soon be over. Just a little while longer...

**AN: Sorry, had to end it there. Isn't this the best cliffhanger? I will start writing the next part as soon as possible. Don't forget to feed the cookie-monster, AKA, the review-monster. :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Merlin, its characters or its magic.

**AN:** Any and all mistakes are mine. I am currently watching all the episodes of Merlin that have commentary. I can't believe how funny some of them are. Really, go watch them if you haven't already!

Tears of an Angel Chapter 11

The heat was too much to bear. Merlin closed his eyes, tears running down his cheeks. Against his closed eyelids, his visions were slowly fading. He could still hear cries, but at this moment, he didn't know whether it were his cries or those of a thousand others inside his mind. The smoke entered his mouth, sucked into his lungs, but he didn't have the strength to cough. It was like everything was numbing after having been through excruciating pains.

A darkness began to rise, one that threatened to consume him. He was frightened, not knowing what would happen once he was completely absorbed by it. Would he ever wake up or was this the end? _His_ end? Thoughts raced through his mind during the short few seconds that he still had. He thought of Arthur and his future as King. He thought about Guinevere, imagining her with a beautiful gown as a Queen. He thought of Gaius and Lancelot. He thought of...it became too difficult to think.

Pain that had numbed his legs and stomach now reached his arms and neck. His skin burned, knifes seemingly cutting through it like he was mere butter. He wanted to scream, but his throat had swollen, no more sound able to escape it. All that he could see now, was darkness. No more unfamiliar faces, no more visions. It had ended. After all these days, he was free. He would have been joyful, if he wasn't dying at the moment.

The fire reached a new hight, but he no longer noticed. He couldn't breathe, he couldn't think anymore. The darkness had swallowed him and he drifted away into a silence.

-o-o-

Lancelot knew that time was running out. The sun had completely risen above the horizon, announcing the new day. A new, _terrible_ day. He found himself running through the lower streets of Camelot and, judging by the few people that were present there, something was happening on the main square. _Merlin's execution_. He didn't bother looking back. He could hear Alec and Annabeth running behind him, following his every move.

As they got closer to the castle, Lancelot noticed the smoke rising into the air. His heart skipped a beat. He _couldn't _be late. Merlin depended on him and he was going to fail. Having his death on his consciousness would be a burden Lancelot wouldn't be able to bear. He picked up the pace, sprinting now. He ran into people, knocking them over, but he didn't waist time apologising.

The sight he saw when reaching the main square horrified him. Merlin stood amidst a large fire, his eyes closed and his cheeks wet. Fire and smoke surrounded him, rising higher until the young sorcerer was completely swallowed by it. Lancelot pushed forward, through the mass of people, needing to reach Merlin.

The King had spotted him and the Knight's intentions were clear. "Stop him!" Uther's voice was commanding, his hand pointing towards Lancelot. Guards instantly rushed forward, drawing out their swords and ready to attack. Lancelot, spinning around on his heels, looking away from Merlin, quickly drew out his own sword. With a flick of his wrist, the sword turned elegantly in hand. It was an easy move, but the guards seemed impressed, their attack haltering for a moment.

It was long enough. Lancelot stormed forward, charging at the guards and fought them bravely. He didn't need to win, all that he needed to do, was to buy them time. Alec and Annabeth rushed forward as well, standing directly before the fire now. Their hands rose and their words melted together. "_Ddiddyma'r danio_." Their eyes turned golden while wind and rain erupted, the fire instantly dying out.

Again, Uther's voice sounded through the square. More panic seeped through his voice, the mere sight of sorcerers stressing him. "Kill them!" he bellowed. More guards rushed forward and the citizens of Camelot, alarmed and distressed, ran in all different directions. It caused enough distraction and panic for Alec and Annabeth to run up the extinguished. They untied his burned hands, Merlin's body instantly falling forward, but Alec caught him gracefully.

Lancelot didn't hesitate. He joined them, his eyes widening when setting first sight on the young servant. "My God," he breathed. Merlin's skin was burned red and black. He could barely breathe anymore, only a rasping sound escaping his lips. As every second passed, more color drained from his face, his body going limp in Alec's arms. "Save him," Lancelot begged, kneeling down. Behind him, he could hear more guards approach, but for the moment, his entire attention was directed at Merlin.

"He's very weak," Annabeth sighed, her hand feeling his pulse, "_Ysgyfain bod rhyddha_." Her eyes flashed golden, a spell starting to take effect on Merlin as he coughed, his lungs becoming clear of smoke. It wasn't enough, however, and his breath was still shallow. "_Chwisg'n ddawfn_." Her eyes changed color again and this time, Merlin stopped coughing. He stopped moving all together and Lancelot feared that he had died, but his chest still moved up and down slowly. He had fallen into a sleep.

"Lancelot," Alec said, still holding onto Merlin tightly as he pointed towards the middle of the main square. The Knight turned his head, seeing two dozen guards approach them. The King had disappeared from his balcony, no doubt hurrying towards them now through the halls of the castle. Lancelot's gaze was suddenly drawn towards a man appearing behind the guards, a sword in his hand.

"I order you to stop," Arthur's voice was adamant. His eyes stood wide, filled with relief and fear at the same time. The guards turned to look at their Prince, unsure what to do now. Lancelot knew that Arthur was heading down a dangerous road, Uther probably locking him in a dungeon for months after this.

Lancelot didn't allow himself to think about that and he focused back on Merlin. "Please," his gaze connected with Alec's, "help him." Merlin's face was completely ghost-like, his lips blue. Around his eyes, dark circles had appeared and only now did Lancelot see how skinny he was, all bones. Then again, he couldn't remember the last time he had seen Merlin eat something decent since he had gotten back from the dead.

The young Druid boy nodded, his hand resting on Merlin's chest. His free hand took Annabeth's and he closed his eyes. "_Chymor niar gerdded_!" A sudden wind filled the main square, transforming into a whirlwind and swallowing Alec, Annabeth and Merlin whole. Lancelot stumbled backward, falling of the pyre and landing flat on his back.

"Lancelot!" Arthur yelled as he watched the Knight fall back. He ran forward and pulled him back upwards. Lancelot grabbed for the back of his head, his vision twisting and turning. His edges were blurry, but it only took him only a few moments to adjust and push down his nauseous feeling.

"What happened?" he could hear Arthur ask, but Lancelot couldn't answer. He wasn't sure what happened. All that he knew, was that Merlin was gone. Behind them, the King approached. His face was red with rage.

"Seize that man," Uther yelled, pointing towards Lancelot, "lock him in a cell."

This time, the guards didn't hesitate. Lancelot could feel his arms being pulled behind his back in a painful motion and he grunted. The guards took his away from the extinguished pyre, but Lancelot gazed only at Arthur who seemed unsure of what to do now. The King still held the highest authority after all.

"Father," Arthur spoke, but he was instantly silenced by the King's waving hand.

"Silence!" Uther barked. He turned on his heels and strode away from the square. "Follow me, Arthur."

As Lancelot was dragged into the castle, the last thing he saw, was Arthur obediently following his father. The Knight could only hope that tomorrow, it wouldn't be him to be executed.

-o-o-

Arthur stood before the window in his bedchambers. The main square below him was completely abandoned now. The pyre still stood in the middle and smoke still wandered low over the ground ever since the wind had completely disappeared. The weather was deadly silent, but dark clouds had started to drift into the city. A thunderstorm could break loose any moment.. It all had something ominous, like a horrible event had just taken place.

It _had_ taken place, but it had been hours ago.

The sun had begun to settle, shadows falling over Camelot. The city had fallen back into its normal pattern, the panic of the people having died away. Now, most were just exited about it, telling stories already. Arthur had heard servant talk about a dozen magical people saving Merlin. A servant girl had been speaking of how Merlin must have possessed the people helping him. Arthur had wanted to fire every single one of them, but of course he couldn't. He was enough trouble as it was.

He had never before seen the King so enraged. He had yelled for what must have been two hours. Uther had been furious, disappointed and horrified. For a moment, Arthur had expected him to choke on his words, but the King had only swallowed down an entire goblet of wine, only to continue raging on. Arthur had been silent the entire way. For one, talking wouldn't have helped anything. Two, he was too occupied with thinking about Merlin.

He had absolutely no idea where he was. Was he even alright? Had the Druids been able to save him? What if they had been too late? Merlin's final screams still ringed so clearly through his head. They had been so loud, so terrified and filled with pain. Arthur had heard people scream before while burning on the stake, but he never really paid it any attention. But this had been Merlin, his goofy, idiot servant who wouldn't harm a fly.

A knock echoed through his chamber. "Enter," the Prince called out. For a short moment, he expected his father to walk in, wanting another round of yelling and telling how irresponsible Arthur had been. But of course, Uther wouldn't knock. Not after everything that had happened today.

It was Morgana who entered, carefully closing the door behind her. Her face was filled with worry and his skin pale (at least more pale than usual). Arthur could notice a slight tremble in her hands as she folded her hands before her. "Have you heard anything?" she asked, her voice high.

Arthur shook his head. "No," he said, "but I'm sure he's fine."

Morgana scoffed uncomfortably. "_Fine_?" Her eyes widened. "Have you seen him before those Druids took him?" She swallowed heavily. "He looked-"

"No," Arthur didn't want her to spoke those words, "he's not dead. He's fine, Morgana." He watched how she averted her gaze, though he wasn't sure why. Perhaps there were emotions written in her eyes that she didn't want Arthur to see. The Prince knew she was feeling them as he was feeling them too. "Look at me," slowly, he walked towards her, "we have to believe that he is fine."

Morgana looked into Arthur's eyes and they shone brightly. "The Druids are good people," she said carefully, "they will help him. You can trust them."

Arthur exhaled slowly. The Dragon had told him they would be able to help Merlin, but could he therefore trust them? There were so many of them that had tried to kill him in the past, to kill his father. It was like a switch in his head, but he couldn't flip it. Even thinking about the Druids made the little hairs in the back of his neck stand straight.

"I hope you are right," he told Morgana. If he couldn't believe he could trust the Druids, then at least he needed to believe that they would help Merlin. He had spoken to Lancelot already, albeit in a cell, but the Knight had assured him that those Druids, Alec and Annabeth, could be trusted. "We can only hope my father will see reason in the morning," he sighed.

Morgana instantly knew what Arthur was talking about. Her jaw tensed and she planted her hands in her sides. "Lancelot only did what he thought was right," she spoke harshly when thinking of Uther's actions, "he only wanted to help a friend."

Arthur sighed. "We'll have to break him out," he told her, "my father will have him executed." He turned towards his window again, the sun now having completely disappeared. The sky above them was completely black, not a star visible. In the distance, thunder rumbled and Arthur already dreaded the moment when it would reach the city.

"Then we'll act quickly," Morgana said, determined, "we'll break him out tonight."

Arthur turned back to look at Morgana and saw her grin. There wasn't another choice, really. Since the execution had failed today, Uther would not want to see another one end in dismay. Lancelot would probably face his end in the morning. "Alright," Arthur said, "we'll break him out tonight."

-o-o-

Merlin's breath came rasping. Annabeth's spell had worked well in clearing his lungs, but he had still been badly wounded. As he wanted to turn in his sleep, Merlin moaned softly, his face torn into a grimace. Alec had made sure, however, that he remained in a deep sleep. It was the only way that he could help ease the pain. The burns still covered most of his skin, the marks dark, black even around the area of his feet and legs. As soon as they had arrived in their camp, the people had gathered and used magic to heal him. The burns were very severe, however, and healing him completely would have put too much stress on his body.

They had done all they could for now. They would have to wait until the morning before more healing spells could be used. After all, Merlin's body was under a lot of stress and he needed a lot of rest. Using magic on him, even if it were to heal his wounds, could cause his heart to give out. Everything was looking good, however, and Alec even dared closing his eyes for a moment. He could feel himself drifting of into a sleep, but a hand on his shoulder called back his attention.

He gazed up to meet his father's eyes. "I will look after him," Iseldir smiled assuringly, "go get some rest."

Alec sighed. "I promised I would save him, father" he said, looking back towards the sleeping Merlin, "will I be able to keep that promise?"

Iseldir turned to look at Merlin as well. He reached for his face, the tips of his fingers slightly touching Merlin's cheeks. Iseldir closed his eyes and a moment passed of complete silence. "He dreams," Iseldir said, his eyes still closed, "he rests. His mind is strong and so is his body." Opening his eyes, he looked back to his son. "You will be able to keep your promise."

Alec nodded, relief filling him. Annabeth might not believe that Emrys would bring back magic to Camelot, but he did. The mere thought of his death send shivers down his back. He longed to live in a land where he didn't have to hide, where his children wouldn't have to hide. "How is Annabeth?" he suddenly asked his father, knowing he had been with her.

"The magic she used to save Merlin initially demanded a great toll on her," Iseldir said serious, "but she is alright and so is your little child inside of her."

A second wave of relief filled him. "She insisted on coming along," Alec sighed, "I should never have allowed it."

Iseldir knelt down before his son, their gazes connecting. His kind eyes brightened. "You did what was right," he assured him, "and no harm was done. Emrys will live and so will your loved ones. Now go to Annabeth, get some rest."

Alec nodded. He was very tired. Rising from his seat, he threw his father one last smile and then left, knowing that in the morning, more magic would be used on Merlin. He would need his strength then so he might as well get some sleep.

-o-o-

All the while, Merlin slept. For hours, he dreamed vividly, images flashing before him. They were visions, that much Merlin knew, but not new ones. He had seen so much and his mind hadn't been able to handle it. He had seen death and destruction. He remembered having seen all of this before, but only now did it make sense.

He could see Arthur sighing his last breath and Mordred standing before him as it happened. He could see Gwen and Lancelot, strangely together. There was no death in the scene, but there was destruction, though Merlin did not understand how or why. The image changed and suddenly, Merlin could see himself. He looked older, his hair less black. His eyes had changed as well. They still had the same colour, but they were...deeper somehow. Merlin watched himself and saw how he wasn't alone.

Morgana was with him, but she had changed as well. Her eyes were cold, bitter. Merlin witnessed how Morgana grinned broadly at the elder Merlin. Words were exchanged, but Merlin couldn't understand what was said. A long moment passed and Merlin waited patiently. Swiftly, Morgana raised her hand and used magic, sending Merlin flying backwards.

It had been a complicated spell, that much Merlin had understood, and fear embraced his heart. He was watching himself die. He would die by Morgana's hand!

Merlin's eyes opened, jolting upwards as panic spread through him. Four strong arms held him down and Merlin looked upwards, meeting the gazes of two unknown men. They looked friendly, however, though worry resided in their eyes. "Easy," the white-haired man soothed him, "don't panic."

Merlin felt a horrible ache throughout his entire body. Even breathing bloody hurt. "Where am I?" His voice was hoarse, barely audible.

"You are with Druids," the red-haired man explained, "I am Alec and this is my father Iseldir. We saved you."

Memories came rushing back, but they all ended when he had fallen unconscious on the pyre. He didn't remember any Druids saving him. He was grateful, though, because he knew he owed them his life. "Thank you," he whispered, smiling faintly. Exhaustion flooded him and his eyelids became very heavy again. He had barely time to realise that he was falling back asleep, or perhaps those Druids were using a spell? Merlin honestly didn't care. All that he knew, was that the pain was easing away again and the sleep brought comfort for this time, Merlin dreamt of Ealdor.

**AN:**** I had mapped out this complete chapter, but to actually write it was difficult. I couldn't get it right, couldn't get it to flow. I changed bits, threw some sentences around and now I can only hope that it isn't a completely mess. It seems that all the studying is sucking up my writing skills (the few I have...) I do hope it was enjoyed.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Merlin, its characters or its magic.

**AN:** Any and all mistakes are mine. Sorry for the very long wait, but my pc crashed, I lost all my chapters and these exams aren't giving me much free time to rewrite everything. So sorry again! I hope you'll enjoy this chapter anyway!

**Tears of an Angel**

**Chapter 12**

The guards pushed open the heavy, wooden doors as they saw their Prince approach. Arthur would have greeted them properly, but his mind was too occupied. He needed to focus, to play his part perfectly if he wanted the plan to succeed. Arthur would have helped Lancelot escape from the dungeons without a second thought, but of course Morgana had come up with a better plan. At least, she claimed it was a better plan. Arthur was not convinced yet.

His father looked up from the papers scattered before him. They looked like maps, even a few peace treaties among them. Uther was always maintaining the peace in Camelot and therefore, he always was suspicious of his allies, or enemies as they would always remain in the King's eyes. Arthur felt lucky to find his father alone. He cleared his throat before speaking.

"My Lord," he bowed his head in respect, "I wish to speak with you."

Uther's eyes were cold when he looked up to see his son. Uther, like everyone present at the attempt of execution of his servant, had noticed Arthur's strange behaviour. He had seen how the Prince had helped Merlin escape and even hours of yelling about that had not eased his mind. "What is it?" His tone was very curt, uninterested.

"It is about Merlin, my servant," Arthur began, but Uther already rose his hand.

"I don't wish to hear anything of this matter," Uther almost spat, "when he is found, he will be hanged." He turned his gaze back to his maps and other official business. "There will be no saving for him then."

"I'm afraid you do not understand, Sire." Arthur would not let himself be dismissed so easily. This was about Merlin after all, and Lancelot. He refused to give up because their lives depended on how well Arthur could lie. "Merlin is entirely innocent. As is Lancelot."

When Uther looked back at his son, his eyes were two thin lines. "Have you lost your mind, son?" There was a hint of concern in his voice, but a lot more anger and disbelief. "I have seen him use magic before me," his voice rose, louder and colder, "and I have seen...that Lancelot help him escape. And you are defending him as well?"

Arthur needed to remind himself not to sound insubordinate. Uther was angry enough already and making the matters worse wouldn't help his cause. "I am saying that they are not responsible for their actions," Arthur chose his words carefully, drawing his father into his lies, "they are _enchanted_."

That made Uther's eyes become even more distant, more cautious. "Enchanted? And how could you know?" The King rose from his seat, his hands resting on the table surface. "You have helped your former servant escape. Are you enchanted?"

"I was merely trying to protect his life," Arthur bit down on his lower lip, hoping that Uther would believe him, "and I am here to ask you to spare Lancelot's life as well."

Uther huffed angrily. "He is a traitor to his Kingdom!"

Arthur ignored his father's comment. "The Druids are responsible," he said, "they are what caused all this. You have seen two of them risk everything for Merlin, does that not tell you anything? They are the ones responsible, the ones who should be punished." He took a step closer towards the King. "They had a plan and they failed."

Arthur could see he had peeked his father's attention and he had to suppress a smile. Everything was going well. "The Druids were aware that Merlin was...dear to me," he continued slowly, "and so they brought him back from the dead so that they could use him to get to me. Merlin was supposed to kill me, but reviving someone from the realm beyond," he sighed, "it is dark magic and it failed." Arthur paused a moment to let it all sink in. "They have enchanted Lancelot when realising that Merlin would no longer be able to fulfil his task."

"Then there is all the more reason to execute the man," Uther sounded sure of his words. He appeared more calm again, his shoulders becoming more relaxed. "If your safety is on the line, I must think of that first."

"Here me out, father," Arthur urged, "because for as long as these Druids live, they are risking your Kingdom."

Uther's back straightened. "Then what do you propose," he asked, "those Druids will be long gone by now. Merlin is in there hands, but we still have Lancelot."

"Exactly," Arthur half smiled, "if I can release him, help him escape with you permission, he will lead me straight to them. Then I can kill the Druids and Merlin and Lancelot will be released from their enchantment."

Uther said nothing for a long moment. "I can not have you risk everything for the sake of mere subjects. Your life is too valuable to me." There was the faintest hint of affection in Uther's voice, but it had passed so quickly that Arthur wasn't sure if he had even heard it all.

"They threaten everything our Kingdom stands for," Arthur argued, "if they are allowed to live, they will cause more trouble and they will find a way to kill me and you in the end!"

Uther sighed. A long moment of silence passed and Arthur could see that Uther was contemplating his words. "Take two Knights with you," he finally said, "if it are only the two druids we saw helping your servant, then that should be enough to kill them. If you are outnumbered, you are to return _immediately_ to Camelot. You can take more men then. You are right, Arthur," Uther said comprehensive, "these Druids must be stopped."

Arthur bowed his head in respect. He could feel relief flood him. This plan was happening smoothly, but it was not done yet. Much could still go wrong and Arthur needed to keep himself focused. "Thank you, my Lord," he said before turned around and leaving the council chamber.

When reaching the dungeons, Arthur needed to remind himself not to smile. He needed to play out the role well. He was supposedly breaking out an enchanted Lancelot while all he was going to do, was walk him out of the castle really. It was important, however, that the guards believed him. No doubt, they would instantly report every detail back to the King.

He reached the end of the stairs, two men instantly rose from their seats, bowing their heads in respect. Arthur greeted them back with a sly smile. "My father requests the presence of all guards," Arthur lied smoothly. He could already hear a rattling inside a cell. No doubt, it was Lancelot moving towards the cell door. "The King has an important announcement."

The two men were hesitant at first, but then they hurried away, not able to disobey an order by the King or Prince. Arthur smiled when watching them disappear out of his view. Now there was no one around to spy on Arthur. He could be himself again. He walked in front of Lancelot's cell and instantly found himself grinning at the other man.

Surprise filled Lancelot's voice when he spoke. "Arthur?"

"You didn't think I would leave you here, did you," Arthur said. He opened the cell and allowed Lancelot to walk out. "We must hurry."

He didn't have to say that twice. Lancelot almost ran out of the hallway, Arthur following him close behind. There were no more guards around, which gained him a suspicious look from Lancelot, but Arthur urged him to move forward anyway. He would explain later.

They didn't stop running until they reached the open sky before the castle. Standing on the steps leading down the main square, the two men gazed at each other for a short moment.

Suspicion rose in Lancelot's eyes, his brown eyes becoming very small suddenly."What did you do?" he demanded to know.

Arthur bit down his lower lip. Lancelot wouldn't be pleased to hear his plan. "I told my father you and Merlin are under a spell," he said hesitantly, "and that I would help you escape."

"And he agreed?" Lancelot was clearly not believing a word the Prince was saying. Then again, it sounded like a crazy plan the King would most likely never approve of.

Arthur flashed a great smile. "Well, I also told him that if I'd help you escape, you would lead me to the Druids responsible for this late mess so that we can get rid of them."

Lancelot frowned. "The Druids didn't do this."

"I know," Arthur rolled his eyes, "but my father doesn't know that. He believes the Druids used you and Merlin to get to me and now he believes that you will lead me to them so I may kill them."

Lancelot shook his head while rolling his eyes. "I can't believe that he bought that story," he said, "but I'm glad he did."

"I can be very persuasive when it comes to magic and my father," Arthur said rather proudly, "now," he turned and laid his hand on Lancelot's shoulder, "now we can go and find Merlin and bring him home again."

A faint smile filled Lancelot's face. "I can take you to where I met Alec and Annabeth. Hopefully we can pick up a trail there that will lead us to them."

"Then let's go," he said, "perhaps we can find them by morning. Oh, and," Arthur glanced back for a moment and then focused on Lancelot again, "there will be two Knights following us. Don't worry about them, they can be trusted."

"What?" Lancelot sounded slightly shocked.

"Sir Leon and Sir Pellinor will cause no trouble," Arthur assured him, "I told them of the Druids not being responsible and that we are simply going to retrieve Merlin. They don't even know of his magic."

Lancelot sighed heavily. "I guess we don't have much of a choice then," he said.

-o-o-

Merlin opened his eyes, but he quickly squeezed them shut again. The light was too bright for his eyes to bear. Slowly, he became aware of the aching throughout his entire body. His skin felt new, sore and his muscles had a burning sensation as if he had moved them in weeks. Perhaps that had been the case. How long had he slept anyway?

This time, he opened his eyes more carefully. He realized he was lying on a rather comfortable bed inside a tent. Besides him, a small table stood that held small flasks and a bowl of water. Merlin pushed himself upwards, his head instantly beginning to spin. He inhaled deeply to steady himself by grabbing the edge of the table. Pushing aside his blanket, he noticed how the skin of his legs and feet still looked a raw pink as if scars covered it entirely.

He gasped when moving his toes. It felt as if a thousand needles has just pierced them. His breath came rasping and he swallowed in order to calm himself. Carefully, he moved his legs over the edge of the small bed. It still ached all over, but the worst pain was slowly ebbing away. The tent opened and a red haired man entered. Merlin searched his mind for his name, but he came up empty.

"You shouldn't be trying to get up," the man said, smiling warmly, "you're not fully healed yet." He moved closer towards Merlin, his green eyes piercing Merlin's blue ones.

"I'm sorry," Merlin apologized, "I don't remember much."

"You don't remember my name," the man didn't sound offended, "I'm Alec."

Of course, Merlin thought, now he remembered. "I'm with the Druids," he recalled, "because you saved me from the pyre." Memories of fire and burning flesh made a shiver run down his back. It was like the air began to press down on Merlin, making it very difficult for him to breathe, but he forced himself to focus. He wasn't in the fire anymore, he kept repeating in his mind, he was safe.

Alec nodded. "Indeed," he smiled faintly, but then he turned very serious, "you were almost too far gone for us to heal you. You were very severely burned and," he sighed, "and for a moment we thought you were lost."

Merlin chuckled humourless. "You won't get rid of me that easily." The words almost didn't seem to be his. He shouldn't be making jokes like this, certainly not when the situation had been so grim.

"You're still wounded, however," Alec nodded to his legs, "but that will soon clear up. You are to receive another healing spell this evening." Alec turned around, heading for the small table and picked up the smallest flask there. He handed it to Merlin and motioned for him to drink it. "It will ease the pain."

Merlin did as he was asked and he could feel its effects instantly. A numbness was taking hold of his legs, and at the same time making them feel heavy and thick. He didn't care, however, and pushed himself up from the bed, standing on his legs now. He nearly lost balance, but Alec shot forward, his arms suddenly around Merlin's shoulders.

"Easy," the young man warned Merlin, "your muscles still need to gain back their strength."

Merlin stood, however, tall and strong, a grin on his face as he was proud of what he was doing. "I'm alright," he assured Alec, "it doesn't hurt."

Slowly, Alec released his grip and then took a step back. Merlin, feeling that he had found his balance, lifted his foot and took a step towards Alec again. He didn't fall or felt a sudden agony throughout his body and so he took another step. And another. He walked slowly, a little wobbly and from time to time, he threatened to fall down, but Alec was at his side to help him regain balance.

"Wait," Alec suddenly said. He left the tent, only to appear a moment later with a walking stick in his hand. He handed it to Merlin whose eyes had become big and round.

"I can't use that," he protested, "I'm not _old_."

"It will help," Alec rolled his eyes, "and it's only temporary."

Merlin sighed in annoyance, but he complied and used the stick. He didn't want to admit it, but it made walking easier. They exited the tent together and Merlin felt the warmth of the sun instantly hitting his face. He welcomed it, having thought that he would never feel it again.

"So," Alec sounded hesitant and when Merlin turned to look at him, he cast aside his gaze, "no more visions then?"

Merlin shook his head. His mind was completely clear of images, except for those that were now in his memories. Those of Morgana and him. Of Gwen and Lancelot. Of Arthur. It pained him that he still remembered it and for a moment, he considered to find a spell to help him forget, but he already that no magic would be strong enough to erase those visions from his mind.

"Not anymore," Merlin answered, his voice soft. He felt cursed, like an abomination that shouldn't exist. Time was complex and no person should know the future. He did and he couldn't change it which made it all the more difficult.

They continued to walk slowly since Merlin couldn't go very fast, but they had already distanced themselves from the camp. It wasn't a large settlement, Merlin noticed, perhaps forty or fifty men, woman and children. Tents stood close to each other, a few children running between them as they were playing. It seemed like a warm environment to live in.

"Have you seen your own future then?" Alec asked. Curiosity had filled him, a gaze in his eyes that was brighter than anything Merlin had seen before. He liked this man already for he was calm and peaceful, and he didn't seem like a man that would use magic in a way it shouldn't be used.

"I can't change it," Merlin explained, "I can't change any future. What I have seen, it will happen." He looked into Alec's eyes, noticing they had turned a little sad, almost pitiful. Merlin threw him a reassuring smile. "Don't worry," he said, "I have made my peace with this."

"But now that you know," Alec wasn't able to understand, "how can you just...continue?" He stopped walking, waiting for Merlin to turn and look at him again. "Isn't there anything you can do? Any death you can stop?"

"Death is part of life," Merlin said, "you can not cheat it and I don't want to. I have tried before, but the cost is high. _Too_ high." He saw another flash of curiosity cross Alec's face, but Merlin didn't plan on telling him the story of the questioning beast.

"Can you tell me," Alec spoke slowly, almost insecure, "if we will ever be allowed to return to Camelot? How long will we be living like this?" He threw his gaze back towards the settlement and then waited for Merlin to answer him.

A realisation dawned upon Merlin. "You talk about your child," he said. He had seen Alec and Annabeth in his visions like he had seen so many people. Some he had forgotten, but he remembered most of them. He didn't know any names or exact dates, but as he had seen someone in a vision, he had somehow understood who they were, what their purpose was. He had seen Arthur that way, he had seen him as a King, an honest and righteous one.

Alec swallowed heavily, but he nodded.

"Your child will grow old," Merlin's gaze became distant suddenly as he remembered the vision. He closed his eyes, needing more details and the picture became clear before him once more. "He dies, knowing that he has lived a full life. Your son will be happy."

Opening his eyes again, he hadn't expected Alec to be smiling at him. "I didn't know it was a boy," the man cheered, "I will have a boy? A son?"

Merlin smiled. "A beautiful little child."

"This is wonderful," Alec's entire face brightened, his smile reaching all the way to his eyes. "I must tell Annabeth and my father as well. I must tell everyone!"

Behind them, back in the settlement, a sudden commotion could be heard. Children disappeared into the tents and man gathered together. Both Merlin and Alec turned to look at what was going, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Iseldir came rushing towards them and Merlin's mind raced in panicked thoughts. Was there an attack? Had there been an accident?

When Iseldir reached them, however, he didn't seem distressed. In stead, he just turned to look at Merlin. "You have visitors," he announced, "Prince Arthur and Lancelot."

**AN:** I'm not sure if you can feel it, but an end is nearing. I don't know how many more chapter will come. One? Perhaps two? I'll see what happens in the next chapter. I hope you liked this! Little review please?


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Merlin, its characters or its magic.

**AN:** Any and all mistakes are mine. I'm relieved everyone enjoyed the previous chapter so much. It was a pretty important chapter, wasn't it. I can only hope that this a good chapter as well :)

**Tears of an Angel**

**Chapter 13**

Arthur let his gaze dart around the camp as so much could be seen. Children, who were now safely inside tents, had been playing in the grass and between the trees. The faces of men were rough, their arms broad and strong, while the women looked kind and motherly as they gathered the children en rushed them inside. As many looked at the new arrival, Arthur in this case, their gazes become cold, though, almost distant. When looking at Lancelot, no one seemed to have a problem, however, which annoyed Arthur beyond comprehension.

A young woman came walking towards them, her blonde hair waving in the wind. Arthur could already tell from this distance that she was pretty and young. When she came to a halt before the two men, she crossed her arms before her chest and pressed her lips together. She didn't seem to make any motion towards speaking.

Lancelot smiled. "Hello, Annabeth."

So that was her name. Arthur had recognized her from the city since it was her that had helped Merlin get away from the pyre. Even with Lancelot's disarming smile, the girl remained tense, almost vigilant.

"What are you doing here?" Her voice was strong, confident. "What is _he_ doing here?"

Arthur wasn't used to being spoken to in such a manner and he had to force himself not to say anything about it. He was the Prince of Camelot and he was used to be treated with respect. Then again, he stood in the middle of a Druid where many, in other words all of them, hated the King and therefore his son as well. Arthur realized that he should be grateful to even be allowed within the boundaries of the settlement.

Lancelot spoke softly, his smile having disappeared. "We are only here to see Merlin and not cause any trouble, Annabeth. Please, tell us he is alright because last we saw him..."

"I've nothing against you, Lancelot," Annabeth said, her tone more gently, "really, I like you. You seem like a descent man, but _he_ –" she turned her eyes to Arthur and they narrowed almost viciously, "he is not welcome here. Who isn't to say that he'll come back later and slaughter us all."

Arthur couldn't help but admire the woman. She was one of the first that dared speak her mind to him. He also couldn't believe that she would think this of him. He could see these people were peaceful, harmless. It was rude of her think that he would be that ruthless. "You saved Merlin," he spoke for the first time, "and for that I am entirnally grateful. Thank you for saving him."

Doubt crossed Annabeth's eyes.

Arthur smiled reassuringly. "How is he? I only want to see him, see that he's alright. Tell me where he is, please."

Now Annabeth rolled her eyes, a gesture Arthur hadn't expected her to make. "Well, I can tell you where he isn't and that is in his bed. He really should be resting, but he's off anyway."

Arthur chuckled. "That's Merlin, never doing what he is supposed to be doing."

It seemed that he had broken through Annabeth's shield because a warm smile started pulling at the corners of her lips. She still didn't seem entirely convinced that she could trust the Prince, but this was a start at least.

When she realised that she was actually smiling, however, she quickly snapped her lips shut again and turned on her heels, striding away without another word. Arthur was speechless. He wasn't sure if he had ever met a woman like Annabeth before.

"That's Annabeth," Lancelot grinned, "I like her."

Arthur would have said something, but his eyes suddenly caught a figure arriving in the distance. He was barely recognisable as he was leaning heavily on a wooden stick that offered support, but as soon as Arthur saw the familiar black hair and blue eyes, he knew he was looking at Merlin. The servant's back was slightly bended and with every step he took, he seemed to be resting for a second. He wore a long blue cloak that touched the ground and his face looked weary.

But it was without doubt the man Arthur had thought never to see again. He hurried forward, rushing towards Merlin as he needed to be sure that he wasn't imagining this.

Merlin flashed the Prince his usual goofy grin. "Hello, Arthur." Turning to look at his left, he looked at a man with bright red hair who Arthur also recognized from the city. "This is Alec," Merlin introduced him to Arthur.

Alec nodded his head slightly, but his eyes remained kind and calm. He was almost the opposite of Annabeth. "Arthur Pendragon," he said, "I have heard much about you."

"Nothing but good things I good," Arthur said. He regretted it immediately. Alec was a druid which meant he wasn't very keen on the monarchy that ruled the land. Of course he wouldn't have heard a lot of good about Arthur.

Alec's face remained the same however. "Merlin told me you are a good man," he said, "and I believe him. I hope I won't regret this in the future, but if you are twice the man your father is..." He trailed of, turning to look at Merlin now. "Take it slow, Merlin, you aren't fully healed yet, don't forget that."

Merlin nodded. "I won't," he said, "thank you for everything, Alec."

Alec bowed his head in respect, a movement Arthur was very familiar with. Only he used to be the one receiving the bowing, not Merlin. Why would he be treated like this? Surely not because he has magic? Everyone here had magic! There had to be something more to it, but Arthur pushed aside these thoughts. Merlin stood before him, alive and almost completely healthy, and that mattered now.

Arthur turned to look behind him, expecting Lancelot to be standing there, but the man had apparently walked away with Alec. He could see they were talking about something exiting and Arthur frowned. "They seem to like each other," he commented.

"Alec is telling him about Annabeth," Merlin said, calling back Arthur's attention, "they are going to have a son."

Arthur smiled. "I am really glad you are okay, Merlin," he said with sincerity in his voice, "I thought you weren't going to make it. Not that I don't have faith in you, I know you're stronger than you look, I mean...– I know...– you aren't...- This is _difficult_!"

Merlin chuckled. He started to walk towards where a fallen tree trunk lay and slowly sat himself down. Arthur watched how pain crossed his eyes, but when Merlin looked back into his eyes, he only saw his clumsy servant. Arthur sat down besides him and had his elbows resting on his knees.

"I'm not sure you should have come, Arthur."

Merlin's words surprised Arthur. "Why not? I had to know you were alright. Last time I saw you, you were near death, burned and in pain. It was a horrible sight and it's one I never want to see again. But here you are, living and breathing."

"I owe these people a lot," Merlin said, "and I wish I could repay them somehow. They are really kind, Arthur, this life, they don't deserve this."

Arthur closed his eyes. He was still coming to terms with Merlin's magic, and he couldn't deal with the druids as well. They had magic, sure, it was a well known fact, but was he really supposed to like them suddenly? After all, hadn't they tried to kill him as many times as Uther had executed one? Arthur forbade himself to think like that. He couldn't condemn these people for the actions of one individual.

"I know, Merlin," Arthur sighed, "I know of your magic."

Merlin remained eerily silent.

The Prince turned to look directly in those blue eyes. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Merlin shifted his balance, his eyes falling to the ground beneath them. "I couldn't," he said, avoiding Arthur's gaze, "I'm sorry, but I just couldn't. I wanted to trust you, really, but we live in Camelot which is a place where people die because of the gifts they are born with."

_Gifts?_ Was that how Merlin saw his magic? As gifts? Arthur couldn't understand how anyone with magic would want to welcome it. There were enough examples of people becoming evil and corrupted because they embraced their_ gifts_. Or was that because of something else? Merlin certainly wasn't evil or corrupted.

"And these people," he asked, "do they have magic?"

"Some of them – most of them," Merlin corrected himself. His eyes moved from druid to druid and finally rested on Arthur. "They are good people, each and everyone of them. If you don't trust them, then trust me."

Arthur slowly nodded.

Merlin smiled, moving his legs a little closer towards his body and he suddenly groaned in pain. Arthur's senses were on high alert in an instance, his hand already on Merlin's shoulder. "Are you alright?"

"My legs," Merlin sighed, "they aren't fully healed yet. I still have some burns on them, but I'll be fine, Arthur, nothing that I can't handle."

Arthur's eyes had become round with disbelief. "Burn marks on your legs? And you're still walking around? You should be in bed, like Annabeth said."

Merlin chuckled, though it wasn't completely convincing. "I didn't know you cared so much."

Arthur gently elbowed Merlin's side in a teasing way and the sound of Merlin's laughter was one he enjoyed. If he hadn't almost died, Arthur would have him pinned on the ground, making him remember who was the Prince and who was the servant. But that would probably only make Merlin feel pain and the druids might not like it either.

"I'm here to take you home, Merlin," Arthur said. He couldn't believe he hadn't actually told Merlin this yet. Merlin's face paled, however, which wasn't something Arthur had thought possible since he already looked very ghostlike. "I spun a story for my father," he quickly explained, "he believes I am actually saving you and Lancelot. He thinks you are both under a spell cast by the druids and that I am here to kill those responsible for the late mess."

"So he thinks the druids are responsible for this," Merlin said slowly, much less enthusiast than that Arthur had anticipated. "They aren't, though, they're completely innocent."

"I know that," Arthur said, "but my father would never believe it and this way, you can return to the city and Lancelot will be free as well. I had to help him escape from the dungeons, Merlin, and if I hadn't spun the story, he might have been executed."

"I know," Merlin closed his eyes for a moment, looking even more exhausted, "_I know_, but they are taking the blame anyway. How are they ever supposed to...they'll never..." He didn't finish his sentence, only sighed deeply.

"They'll never what?" Arthur wanted to know.

"They only want to be accepted," Merlin explained, "not having to live in the woods anymore, hunted down like animals because of who they are. They want a normal life, for themselves and for their children."

That Arthur could understand. It wasn't that he lived a bad life, on the contrary, being the Prince meant that he lived a rich and wealthy life, but it couldn't be called ordinary either. He often found himself wondering what it would be like to be a simple farmer, to be able to have a life with the woman he loved. With Gwen... He couldn't suppress a faint smile covering his lips.

Merlin's voice called back his attention. "What are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking," Arthur said, still holding on to the image of him and Gwen before a small house surrounded by farmlands, "that we'll never have a normal life."

Merlin smiled. "No," he said, "but it is fun. Adventurous."

"You call dying, coming back to life with painful visions of death that are tormenting you and almost dying again on a pyre fun and adventurous?"

"Well, obviously not _those_ parts," Merlin shot Arthur his famous goofy grin, "but it definitely keeps things interesting."

"You really are an idiot, Merlin," Arthur muttered. Then he rose from his seat and watched Merlin do the same, albeit more slowly. For a moment, he wanted to reach out and help him, but something held him back. He didn't want to offend Merlin, make him feel weak, because Arthur was fully aware that he wasn't anything but weak.

"It's time for another healing spell," Merlin announced, " then I will be as good as new."

"And then we can go home," Arthur said.

Merlin's eyes brightened. "And then we can go home."

-o-o-

He was the first Merlin laid his eyes on. Gaius came rushing forward, an entire set of emotions displayed on his old face. Worry, definitely worry, and fear as well, perhaps for what was still to come. Uther had seen him use magic after all and now he was back in Camelot. Merlin conjured a large smile on his face, trying to ease Gaius and it clearly worked.

When the physician reached his ward, his arms already outstretched, Merlin fell into his embrace. He had thought never to see Gaius again, let alone hug him.

Gaius released Merlin from his grasp and took a good look at him, eyeing him with care as if he was searching for wounds. "Good to see you again, boy," he smiled, satisfied to see Merlin in such a good shape.

"It's good to be back," Merlin said, "I never believed it possible."

A short distance away, two women came running down some stairs. Merlin turned to look at them and he pushed down the memory of his visions. He had seen both Morgana and Gwen and he hated what would happen to them, but he chose to ignore it for now. That future lay far ahead and it was the present that mattered.

"Merlin!" Gwen cried, big tears streaming down her soft cheeks. She flung herself at the servant boy and buried her face in Merlin's shoulder. "I was so afraid," she cried, holding onto Merlin strongly, "but here you are, alive and well!"

Merlin pushed away his own tears that were stinging in the back of his eyes. He didn't want to start crying now. "Oh, Gwen," he whispered, "it is wonderful to see you again." Slowly, he let go of her and his gaze moved towards Morgana. As always, she stood tall, full of pride, and only a little smile curving up the edges of her lips.

Her voice was smooth. "Hello, Merlin," she said, "always full of surprises. You disappear half dead in the arms of Druids, only to appear healthy and well like always."

"It's a gift," Merlin smiled.

Morgana's smile broadened, illuminating her entire face now. "It's a gift to treasure then," she said. She folded her arms before her and shifted her weight. "Good to have you back."

-o-o-

Arthur bowed his head deeply when standing before Uther. He wouldn't be addressing him as his father, but as his King which meant he needed to follow all the rules. Bowing, using the correct words, remaining polite and obedient. Arthur disliked every moment of it.

"Ah, Arthur," Uther said, rising from his throne and looking down on his son, "you have returned well." A polite smile filled his face, but it quickly disappeared again since Uther barely showed any emotion when speaking to his son.

Arthur ignored the behaviour. "The plan went well," he announced, "the Druids responsible are dead and both Lancelot and Merlin are back to their old selves." He watched Uther grew almost glum. It made Arthur feel slightly sick. How could his father feel pleased when learning of the death of innocent people. Though Uther didn't know they were actually innocent, it was never appropriate to feel happy about people dying.

"You did well, Arthur," Uther said, "you have aided our fight against magic."

Arthur bit down hard on his lower lip until he could taste the salty blood on his tongue. He wanted to tell his father exactly what he thought, what his vision on magic was, but of course he couldn't. His father would have him locked in a cell for days, weeks even which Arthur would be able to survive easily, but there was no doubt that Uther would have Merlin exicuted, Lancelot as well.

"Thank you, father," Arthur pushed out the words, praying that they didn't sound too forced. He bowed his head again and turned on his heels. Leaving his King alone, he headed to the one place where he knew he would find his servant. Gaius' personal chambers. And he was proven to be right. Not only did he find Merlin and Gaius there, but Lancelot as well, and Gwen and Morgana.

They all looked surprisingly happy but when their gazes fell upon the Prince, worry and anticipation filled their eyes. Arthur knew what they were waiting for. "He believed it," he said, "Merlin and Lancelot are free."

"Thank the gods!" Gaius exclaimed.

But Arthur sought out Merlin's eyes, but found them fixed on him already. For a long moment, they just looked at each other and then both of them smiled. "Thanks," Merlin said silently, "Arthur, thank you for everything."

Arthur stepped forward until he stood before the seated servant. His hand found its way to his shoulder and Arthur squeezed it lightly. "I'm glad you're still my servant," he told him, "my friend."

Merlin's goofy smile became even bigger which Arthur had thought to be impossible. But everything was alright now, Arthur was certain of it, because _Merlin_ was alright.

-o-o-

The end.

-o-o-

**AN:** Well, that's it. The end. First of all, I want to apologize for the spelling and grammar mistakes because I know there will be a few in this chapter. I tried to filter them all out, but some will have slipped through.

Thanks to everyone who read this story, reviewed, alerted or faved it! It was so much fun to write!


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